However, I was not afraid that anything that had to do seemed infinitely worse and more dangerous than dying now, and men would be neither скольконе afraid to leave now, after Ivan, than to wait for tomorrow's test, if such it can be called. Rather, the task it was bequeathed by fallen to his young receiver.
From my will nothing depended. The choice was nothing. Something inside me was saying how important it is transferred to a dying order, and, putting his head on my knees, I sat on the sand, where he joined the footpath up to the shore, and tried to remember everything that he said, struggling with a horrible fear for tomorrow. It cost me a great effort.
Chapter 25.
Barely saw Marina, I took her by the arm and firmly led in полукупе. She was not going to resist.
"Undress, " I said, when we were there, and he pulled off her pants with hollow, sagging knees and shirt, under which more and nothing came.
Marina wrapped up his hands to her breast:
-I'm cold, " she said.
-Now согреемся, " I answered, hurriedly undressing.
-Take there, on the top shelf of a warm blanket, " she said.
I pulled the blanket, threw on the bed and, having felt in a pre-dawn twilight her wrist, laid her hand on his hard member of the standing, feeling pleasantly cold, frozen fingers went around him hot barrel.
-Well, what? — I was excited to hear her words of encouragement, but instead Marina climbed in bed, under the covers and she called from there:
-Go here.
I was beside her, my lips touched her lips, arms went around her waist, and we've been frantically made love, bringing themselves to exhaustion, and after an hour of the pains and pleasures, when time and space are reversed, and it was unknown where up and down, where is the beginning and where is the end, collapsed on the hot bursting fire sheets. In the first, decisive moment when we had to make a choice, I managed to besiege the passion and ask just in case, can you pull the seed in her or not, although the answer was clear, and, having received the consent, I with moans of lust and pain threw it into her womb.
We long lay silent and unmoved, feeling that gave огнедышащему beast passion all the strength and energy.
Unknown how much time passed. Outside the window was daylight. Soon the sun would rise. I felt terrible fatigue and wanted to sleep. The thought that now Wake up Anton and will burst again, shamelessly and blatantly, in полукупе, looking distinctly uncomfortable and uneasy.
-You, probably, should rise? I inquired from the Marina. — Already morning, and you still should work.
-Lie quiet, voice Marina was soft and gentle. — The light now the day on duty.
Does she know?
-Knows. Lezha, Marina was silent for a while, but apparently, she had awakened a desire for a chat. — And you're a married?
I shook my head. I even earlier was noticeably her engagement ring, and now my fingers groped him.
-And you, see everything married?
"Yes, " smiled Marina was little. But not now.
-Why then ring you wear?
Marina shrugged:
I don't know, used to, probably.
"When have you had time to get used? How old are you?
-Me? Nineteen.
-When are you married, and divorced managed?
-Eighteen. Yes, I'm not divorced. Just Roofing, my husband left her for малолетке live.
-How so? What малолетке? — Not I understood.
-Yes, he is with youngster one slept, and then she came to her mother and said that she and her cunt became pregnant from him, and if he did not marry her, she, her mother, him and threatening him.
-So what? Married?
-Yes, the undersigned. Already a born.
-That's it! And you're like, Marina?
-And what about me? One live here. In conductors went, that was fun.
Marina started telling me the sad story of his life, so young and already quite потасканной. She lived once in the unknown, a small town in the Kurgan region, was published in nineteen years married to a Fraction moved with him from the hostel College, where she studied at that time, in одолженную husband with cronies халупку, where they have lived peacefully with six months. Tolik, before becoming a spouse, was her boyfriend, any Marina had escaped from the house from not very loving and caring mother was quite a lot. It does not spread especially, but even this story, only casual dealing with the gray of everyday life provincial youth, варившейся in its own juice, and relationships between the sexes, gave the concept of those knotty, randomly generated and quickly disintegrating relationships, развенчавших all sorts of notions of honor, decency and morality, which prevailed in that muddy the water environment. I listened and was amazed with its simple story, finding in it the same symptoms universal syndrome corruption that existed in the urban atmosphere, more educated and cultural, as it seemed to me, more cultured and high than this poor working young people abandoned provinces, which never worked and will not work in the future, and who are destined to lead his horrible existence, becoming older, then having got old, but not becoming more restrained and wiser in this cloaca, from which rare простолюдину manage to survive — not up the career ladder — is unlikely she would save him from vaccinated vices, — a to shore cleanliness and morality, where are these evils in the clean atmosphere integrity, culture and restraint instincts dry off and disappear of their own a purified conscience for light better, that will befall the seeing man.
My thoughts were sad. Somewhere in the depths of consciousness, I realized that a commoner was himself, and while it also sought to climb up, went in the service, but do not go in the direction where it was planned to open clean beaches, nothing doing, and unable to cope with his dirty vices, облепившими me the same way as millions of my peers that share the sad fate to be citizens of this muddled state, deprived them of all rights and hopes for something bright and joyous. Our roots were scorched, and the tree of wisdom of the nation it was close to complete destruction, not knowing even a single touch the soil of righteousness, once nurtured him from the depths of the passed centuries and of the experience of history. We were separated, we were the children of communism, and its new culture and a short story is not identified any guidance to our generation, as well as the generation of our parents and our grandparents and all those who entered in life after October seventeenth year.
System cut off alien shoots past, and under crimson banners dense, narrow rows we walked a long road to nowhere, go through life, luminous stars lead, gray, faceless shadows, don't leave any trace of his непрощенного existence. "And in the end you will see you, how vain were your plans," — said one of the classics...
The day was already in full swing and the sun was shining in the window when I woke up from a heavy sleep, did not even understand at first why I am lying completely naked in the cold полукупе, where my clothes, and that it's all means. But the details of the last night together with hops out.
In the car was cold. After passing on it, I found in one of the coupe Anton campaign in some men. There was already opened bottle of vodka and placed the glasses.
-Now, let me introduce you, " he said to me. Is Kostya, is Valera, Igor. They ensigns. And Igor officer. Valera with Igor once served together in Mongolia, and now both in Transbaikalia, only in different places, and that's happened to meet here, in this car. Can you imagine? Now sit and Kwasi for this meeting.
I sat down with them. I poured vodka, but I pushed the glass:
-No, guys, I will not drink. Enough, yesterday налакался.
"Hey, man, you who? — Addressed me, Igor.
As this is who? — Not I understood.
-What?! — He put his hand on my knee. — Warrant officer, officer.
"Lieutenant, I breathed with difficulty transferring it fume.
-Lieutenant?" Surprised tipsy Igor. — And I'm the captain. So that's it, Lieutenant, I command you: drink! You're in the army now!
-And if I don't? What then?
"Listen!" What are you борзеешь, guy?! "Maypole Valera.
-Hold on there, hold on there, Valer — pulled him Igor. — We now its so перевоспитаем, in a good way. We always have time to apply!
I was quite puzzled by such an address, and realized that came to the place where you cannot сплоховать and you can either obey, either to prepare for a fierce battle and protecting dignity of such brazen attacks.
-So, Lieutenant, you're wrong, continued to bring me Igor. "Look at his friend. Too Lieutenant, but behaves differently: компанейски. With him here and chat pleasantly. You see: against the team, against the majority in the army to go don't you advise — you get this on the nose. Otherwise you will have to wrong, I tell you, not as a senior rank, and as a senior fellow. I like you, see through. See: horns quickly пообламывают!
I was silent, downcast Глову and wondering, as, in General, had such a situation.
-Well, and that'll be nice to you behave or what?
I had to affirmative nod: Valera reached for the door handle its hefty ручищей, the intention is apparently shut it in case of refusal. This did not Bode well.
Igor handed me the glass, and poured the rest, with a sigh:
-Well, for acquaintance...
Burning alcohol poured into the stomach and spread throughout the body. Head захмелела, and I was already not so bad.
Apparently, my appearance interrupted the conversation, and now it continued as if nothing had happened:
-Well, then still a bachelor, was, " said Valera — served in that... in a separate tank battalion. It then removed, right?
-Removed the agreed Igor.
-Well, he was still there. We with anti-tank battalion, one Park occupied: they front, and we followed them, in the rear. Well, sitting with a friend, Колькой, I have in the duty room, Kwasi. I am a bachelor, he was a bachelor. I was on duty in the Park, and it is the duty of the Park. Only he противотанкистов, and I in the tank. But I advise to sit. Yeah, ha! We drink on, we drink, bottle, second, tenth... Well, there has men friends are sitting. In short, everything's OK. "Чамбур" — moonshine I mean — end — in Barack go, take out the bottle and further.
Campaign again venerated the glasses and Valera continued:
-We have a new chief of staff arrived, the major... his name I do not remember. Лузенков. And now, I already пьянючий sit. Suddenly times! The door person просунулось . well, I told him: "Go on x..!" The face is hidden, then, lo and behold, again leans out. I told him again: "I Went to x..!" It again disappeared, and when it is already the third time seemed, to me through hops realized that it was the chief of staff of our battalion. Well, I got up, the guys say: "come here," and drill rack and took report — hand, as expected, to a headdress applied, — well, maybe покачиваюсь slightly: "Comrade major," and all there is. And he's like let's yelling at me. The oral-oral, until, finally, finally, I didn't get angry and say to him, "Well, comrade major, I'll shoot you now," I just take my gun out of the holster, I snap the shutter... Chief of staff of the frightened soldiers and says he's just with the guard and distributing posts come check: "Direct the machines!" Well, they trunks pointed at me, and I was drunk, reckless, I take them for Dula, the soldiers taking up and toss them on the "spine" of the fence. Mayor sees things are bad, and to give me at once: "Valera. Valera, everything is fine!" And I have not seriously broke and again: "All, you bastard, I'll shoot you now!" And I do not remember, what I got mad at him?.. Ah, he me with dress decided to remove the...
Valera breath, raised already filled glass, and чокнувшись with Igor and those who managed to follow him, continued again:
"Well, now, Лузенков this sees that protect anybody soldiers machines went to look for. And he asked asked, and gone!.. And I swear to God that bad, when I drink, and what not then shot him, I don't know. Several times he did the shot without taking aim. Aim would be exactly укокошил! As he runs, wagging like a rabbit on the field, from a bullet, fool, dodges! I would want from my would not dodged! In General I let go of it with the world.
Valera somehow looked at me, watching and something disoriented for a moment paused, gathering, apparently, to "switch" to me, but then went away, and continued:
On the following day, the most interesting, Wake up, to me this story is told, and I don't believe — I don't remember anything about anything. My neighbor in a hostel duty stood and says: ' You have no feelings lie, I tell you: "Valera, let's gun!", and you answer me, wagging a finger: "No, bring a book to surrender their weapons, I'll see you to it with me off. And I'll gun rent, and you tomorrow you'll say it to you I did not take". Can you imagine?! I must!
Valera once again took up the glass, making it clear to pour:
-I after that experience, generally six months in outfits not go. Guys, I am asked: "Valera, what is it?!" And I say to them: "do Not trust!" Then look me in the outfit set. Come pistol receive, and I give, say that the chief of staff banned. Well, I said to him, bald: "what's The matter, comrade major. This is why!?" And he told me: " You are in the outfit заступай, but without a gun!" And I am his finger: "No, comrade major, such jokes with me will not. A gun or give away, or I dress does not заступлю!"
Valerie looked at the empty glass, and then stopped, but now the conversation caught Igor:
-We also one senior Lieutenant увольнялся. Rather, he was fired. Nothing the boy was only шабутной a little, drink a loved pregnant proshvyrnutsya, — he as in Mongolia was as much his wife remained in the Union, in Ukraine, its none of our and never seen. Once — Сэмэн-his nickname was so named — Semenov — night went to the barracks slightly вмазанный, and something he didn't like the дневальном, and the one on the face of it has got. And the commanders only this and asked: " what Semenov get. And here such puncture! Well, it's under the mark and fired a service mismatch. Wanted to discredit the title, the court officer's honor was even do that happened in the district is not approved wording of the reasons for dismissal. Maybe because his name coincides with the name of the officer commanding the district, I don't know. But the question I am, Сэмэн, already when the court of honor above it produced, the chief of staff of the regiment and division commander says: "I, comrades Lieutenant colonels, well, he's certainly not so expressed, and the stronger I'll shoot!" well, those two струхнули in earnest. And then its only an assistant on duty in the regiment put the outfit and also a gun is not allowed. Neither in the Park, nor in Karaul — nowhere else. So it is up to the dismissal of six months and went "in a box" and the gun never seen. But he? — No troubles from him was not.
