Deadtired

I rose to a crouch and reached for the wall. There was a small indentation, one that looked almost natural. Pressing it in pulled a small lever that locked the counterweight in place below, which of course, also locked the trap, but only for as long as the hourglass lasted. Something like thirty seconds, at a guess.

"Ingenious," I said. "A dwarf who knows what they're looking for will have no trouble with these traps."

"I see," Cinder replied. "Why didn't you trigger it? You were ahead of me."

"I'm likely too light to push the trapdoor down," I said.

I couldn't see Cinder's expression, not with her mask and hood and the limited light, but I did have the impression that she was pouting. "I can't decide if I should be insulted or embarrassed," she said.

"Well, it's probably best that the trap triggered with you. You have the reflexes to handle it." Of course, what I didn't say was that Alex was also lighter and faster besides, and both Rem and Mem had enough legs that even if the trapdoor opened, they'd still be mostly outside of it. "Let's keep an eye open for more traps. I can't think of a single dungeon or underground lair that only uses one singular trap."

Actually, that might be clever. Have a single, obvious trap by the entranceway, then suspiciously laid out corridors and passages and signs everywhere else, but no accompanying traps. Any hero or adventurer venturing (hehe, I'd have to remember that one) into the location would likely succumb to paranoia.

That actually sounded like fun, but I shook the idea off. I didn't need to turn into some petty overlord, now did I?

"We'll move a little more carefully," I said. At the same time, while I turned back towards the front and the direction we were heading in, I silently cast Find Trap.

The spell raced out ahead and some ways behind me, giving me a sense for the location of any traps. I made sure that the spell would exclude any members of our group who might be strong enough to trigger it.

In any case, the dwarves who had created these tunnels had slipped in a number of ways to prevent enemies from travelling through them.

I noticed a shutter hidden in the roof above, ready to drop open and let some boulders fall, a few spring-loaded spears in the walls activated by pressure plates, and even a section of slightly angled tunnel with a very large, round boulder hidden above, ready to drop down and roll onto any unsuspecting foes.

Fortunately, every trap had a way to be disarmed, usually with no more fuss than pressing in a rock along a wall, or pulling up a small, well-concealed lever. After finding the sixth such

disarming system, I began noticing a few almost-natural looking cuts in the stone. It was really seeing the same mark multiple times that clued me in. The dwarves had writing on their walls, cleverly disguised, warning them of any trouble.

More, the marks were at about the height of a dwarf's trailing hand, and were usually quite close to the disarming system. A dwarf moving through here would only need to press a hand to the wall while walking and they'd never had to fear running into one of their own traps.

We were some ways into the tunnel when I first heard the dwarves ahead. Two voices, both distinct, arguing with each other. And growing louder.

"That's the thing! It doesn't matter. The space was minded by the Sander clan first!"

"But the Saw clan's claim is older."

"Oh, sure, but the Saws are all sodding idiots. Who's side are you even on?"

"The side that's right. When the Saw made the claim, they got the rights. It's hardly their fault that the Anvil reformation changed the definition of a fathom."

"Their claim only reaches so low because the new definition is deeper! They wouldn't have had the claim if-Oh precious metals! An undead!"

I raised a hand in greeting as two dwarves rounded a corner and came face-to-shins with our little group. "Hello! My name is-" I began before I was interrupted by a crossbow bolt to the chest.

Fortunately, I was wearing Battle Tweed and the bolt just bounced off without causing any harm.

I brushed my jacket while one dwarf ran and the other hurried to load another bolt into his crossbow. "Please don't be alarmed, I'm merely a visitor. I mean you no harm and only want to-"

I was cut off by another bolt, this one bouncing off my head and burying itself in the ceiling.

"Alex, be a dear and fetch the dwarves for a chat?" I asked.

"Yes Daddy," Alex said before darting ahead in a flurry of skirts and a flash of petticoats. In moments I had two trussed up dwarves on the ground before me, ankles and wrists tied up behind them with neat little ribbons and creative swears escaping with each gasping breath.

"Let's try this again," I said. "Hello, my name is Harold. I'm visiting your fine tunnels and was hoping to speak with a kind dwarf or two in order to perhaps negotiate some things, purchase others, and maybe get some answers to a few basic questions. I mean you no harm, and am in fact more likely to help you than anything else."

One of the dwarves spat in the general direction of my oxfords. "You're not gonna finish me off without a fight, skeleton!" he said.

"Wait, Belt, look, that skeleton's a human one. And that woman back there's looking pretty alive to me. So are the mantises."

"Mantises!" Belt shouted. "By my grandfather's rusty anvil, the damned bugs are allying themselves with the undead now?"

"Not quite," I said. "Now, gentlemen, I'm going to allow my maid to release you. Alex will even return your weapons to you. In exchange, I'd like to have a polite, civil conversation."

"And why would we listen, huh?" Belt asked.

"Because I could very easily get everything I want from your corpse, without the hassle of being polite," I said as I leaned a little closer, close enough that I could see the fire in my sockets reflected off of Belt's eyes.

He swallowed. "Alright," he said. "We can be reasonable."

Alex reached down and tugged the ribbons free with a quick swipe, and the two dwarves carefully climbed to their feet.

Belt seemed like the younger of the two, with a split-forked beard that was a little wild on the edges and a belt full of tools around his hip.

The dwarf next to Belt was similarly garbed, with tooled leather and a few more tools, though his seemed smaller, callipers and measuring devices. His beard was long and well-tended, the tip tucked into his belt to stay out of the way.

"Now, it's a pleasure to meet you both on more civil terms," I said. "Please, take me to your leader!"

[img: https://www.royalroadcdn.com/public/covers-large/62977-magical-girl-crystal-genocide.jpg?time=1707418562]

Magical Girl Crystal Genocide

After Earth's magical girls accidentally destroy the entire planet, they decide to fix their mistake with the power of love, friendship, and overwhelming firepower.

This doesn't go as planned.

This story contains:

— Ridiculously overpowered main characters

— A multi-isekai plot

— Cute girls terrorizing multi-dimensional godlike beings

— Magical girls being as flowery as usual

— Over the top combat

— A protagonist who is occasionally badass, but usually on accident

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Chapter Twenty-Three — Shifty Sanders

Chapter Twenty-Three — Shifty Sanders

The two dwarves glanced at each other, then Belt shrugged. "Don't know what you want with our clan head," he said.

"Mostly, I want to ally myself with your people and maybe help you out. You see, I have a plan for the future, and I was wondering if we could come to a mutually beneficial agreement. It would include me taking control of the surface above your lovely tunnels, of course, and the ability to hire or coerce a fair number of your clansmen, but you wouldn't lose access to the surface, nor would your clan ever want for anything again."

Cinder cleared her throat. "The very very very honourable Sir Harold is an ally of the Ashen Forest sect, as well as Shitake city as a whole. We are here to eliminate the local goddess."

"The mantis queen?" the elder of the dwarves asked.

Cinder nodded.

The dwarf stroked his beard and hummed a little. "I don't know, it's not exactly my place to be making decisions like that."

"Could you take us to someone who is better placed for making that kind of choice?" I asked.

Belt slowly nodded, then he raised a hand with two fingers splayed. "You've got two options, dead guy."

"Oh?"

"First, Orbital here and I bring you to the clan compound. That's some ways deeper in, about two Miles down."

I nodded slowly. If I recalled correctly, a Mile was an exceptionally arbitrary unit of distance. About how long an adult dwarf could walk before they wanted a break. "And the other option?"

"We go up," he said. "The whole damned reason us two are out here is because it's the Sander clan's turn to watch the bugs. There's a garrison above, where the tunnels towards the old queen's nest is. You can talk to the captain of the guard, but they might not take you too seriously, what with the whole, you know, being undead thing and all that. We might be able to smooth the way for you a bit. But, I gotta tell ya, the captain ain't the type to listen to someone he doesn't trust. And you? He won't trust you, dead guy."

"I can work through a little interpersonal friction." I said. I'd certainly worked through worse. "Could you lead us up, then?"

My choice was mostly based on the amount of time I'd already spent on this quest. Killing the Mantis Queen was meant to be a slight detour, no more than a quick trip over and back, but I had severely underestimated the amount of effort required just to reach her, let alone the opportunities I'd find along the way.

That was somewhat common. It was rare that a quest was as easily accomplished as I first expected it to. By a similar token, trying to expect trouble was also a lost cause, because the sort of trouble I found was always unique to the situation.

I had been lucky, this time, in that I was able to gather some information about the situation beforehand. Without Rem, Mem, Cinder, or Alex, I might have tried to make my way to the Mantis Queen through sheer force of necromancy, which would have led to a swift death. Of the queen, that was.

Sure, that would be much faster than following a pair of surprisingly talkative dwarves through some tunnels, but it would have meant missing out on so many opportunities. Like creating an alliance with the Ashen Forest, and making friends with the local dwarves.

Well, I was still working on that latter. "So, would you mind if I ask about the situation with the mantis queen, misters Sander and Sander?"

Belt scoffed. "It's the same as its been for nearly a century now. Longer, I suppose. The queen sends her kids down into the tunnels and we fight them back."

"So it's been a standstill?"

He grumbled, then casually reached towards a wall and deactivated a trap. "No. They're gaining ground and have been forever."

"Why is that?" Cinder asked. "Forgive me, but a century is a long time, our records aren't so detailed."

"Hrm, human, right?" Belt asked. "I suppose your lot aren't that long-lived. In the early days, when the mantis queen installed herself up and over our homes, the nearest clan reached out and tried to oust her with a swift kick in the ass."

"I imagine that didn't play out as planned?" I asked.

"The Nut clan took a hell of a blow that day. The queen herself scoured them from their tunnels and chased them to their home. The place where she lives now is their former clan compound. The rest of the Nut clan lives far below, in little pockets of survivors," Belt said.

Orbital nodded and continued the tale. "The Mantis Queen had her brood spread out, and she set up her main lair, the Nest, on the surface above our heads. Then she sent her young into the tunnels. Every year, the young would come down in swarms, and every year the clans would push them back." He gestured behind him, towards Rem and Mem. "They're strong, you know? It takes at least two dwarves working together to push one back."

"The clans have been bleeding good warriors and losing equipment and tools for a century now," Belt said. "We're sure that we're stronger, but... well, you know how it is."

"Hmm," I hummed. I suspected that I did. The dwarves probably were stronger, assuming that there were a number of clans down here. The problem was likely that they didn't want to cooperate enough to take the Queen down once and for all. Plenty of races had their foibles. Humans were terrible at noticing and acting on the negative changes they brought to their environments. Likewise, dwarves tended to put a lot more importance on infrastructure and long-term growth over smaller, short-term issues.

Even when those issues stretched out into the longer term.

"Is the Sander clan the next nearest to the Queen?" I asked.

"No, no," Belt said. "We're on garrison duty is all. There's a rotation, you see, so that none of us have to lose more than a year or two at the front line."

"We even have it easy. these last couple of months, the younger mantises haven't been crawling down into the tunnels at all," Orbital said.

Rem ground her mandible. "That is because the mother told us to hunt for you," she said, that last part aimed at me.

I shrugged. I had been curious, but didn't need a real answer. I knew the mantis queen had sent her children to hunt me, but I couldn't understand why she hadn't come after me herself. Perhaps she thought her children were enough? Or maybe she didn't want to move out until she was sure of where I was. In any case, it wouldn't be a problem for long, not when I was heading straight for her.

"Who's in charge of the garrison right now?" I asked. "What can you tell me about them?" I could feel more lifeforms ahead. My Detect Animal: Dwarf spell was fading, but not so much that I couldn't tell there was a concentration of dwarves on the edge of the spell's range.

Belt frowned, bushy brows drawing together. "That's Captain Angle Sander, of the Sander clan," he said. "She's a tough one."

"Really tough," Orbital agreed.

"Scary tough," Belt added.

"The reason we're out here checking on traps, tough," Orbital said.

I chuckled. It sounded as if the dwarves were afraid of their leader. Or perhaps respected her. It was hard to tell sometimes, especially when one didn't know the culture very well. Dwarven culture had clearly changed some in the last millenia.

We turned another bend and the tunnel opened up a little. There was a large, natural chamber, complete with stalactites and stalagmites, a few pools, and a small stream that had dug its own path along the floor.