Chapter Two Hundred and Eight — Dine Hard
Chapter Two Hundred and Eight — Dine Hard “Dig in!” I cheered.Most of the crew, minus Steve and Oda, were spread out around the dining room table with their share of supper before them. We didn’t do anything special before eating, but somehow-without ever actually talking about it-we tended to wait until everyone had food on their plate before we’d dig in.There were some nice noises of agreement from the others as they tucked in. The porridge seemed like a good place to start, and some were already cutting into their slices of grilled fish. “I need to thank Amaryllis and Awen, they helped a lot,” I said.Everyone but the two girls slowed down and hesitated to continue eating.“Aww, don’t be like that,” I said. “They’re getting better. I bet they might even get a cooking skill one of these days.”“Oh, please no,” Amaryllis said. “That would be such a waste of a general skill slot.”“Really? I wouldn’t mind it too much,” I said. “It’s not something too awesome, but it’s very practical. I still have a couple of general skill slots to fill, you know?”“I do have some unused slots,” Amaryllis allowed as she picked at her fish. There were still bones and such in it, which made it tricky to eat. “I’m not sure if I should focus on more exploration-related skills, or some that would be more practical in the day-to-day.”“What do you mean?” I asked.“Most people,” Bastion replied. “Will have to make a choice between obtaining skills to help them do the things they do every day, or skills that assist them with their work. Something like Sword-Fighting is a wonderful skill for a Paladin like myself, but it would be wasted on a Farmer. Likewise, I wouldn’t have much use for a Planting skill. But in both cases we’re assuming that a person is heavily specialized. If you’re not, then it makes sense to invest in skills that help you make your everyday life easier.”“It’s a trade off, then,” I said.Bastion nodded. “That’s it. The best people in their field are almost always those that have invested everything into being the best. Every class and every skill. They will be impressively good at the one thing they focused on, whatever that may be.”I nodded along while I considered that. “I don’t know what I want to be,” I said. “I know what I want, but I’m not sure if I need any classes or anything to do that, just hard work.”“I know that your answer is going to be some sickeningly sweet, idiotic tripe, but I find myself compelled to ask anyway,” Amaryllis said. “What’s your goal?”“To make the best friends, and to make sure they’re as happy as can be,” I said.Amaryllis rolled her eyes and Awen giggled. A few others at the table laughed, but I didn’t mind, it was a good laugh.“I recall you mentioning wanting to be strong,” Amaryllis said.“That too,” I agreed. “But I don’t need to be crazy-strong, just tough enough that people will hesitate to hurt my friends.”Bastion hummed, then gestured to me with his fork. “Perhaps focus on skills that will help your role as a captain then. Leadership skills do help in a tight spot, and they’d assist you in your current role as captain, obviously.”“Awa, maybe you should just accept the skill you get naturally? That’s what uncle does. He says that if you’re getting skills because you’re doing something you like, then those skills are the ones the World thinks you’ll enjoy best.”“Huh. I guess that makes sense. It also means I don’t need to worry about it!”“Moron,” Amaryllis said.We continued eating, our constant yammering slowing us down a bit. On the far end of the table, Howard and Clive were having an in-depth discussion about fishing of all things, and Sally and Joe were talking to Gordon about different ports the harpy had visited.I enjoyed the babble of conversation, it made the Beaver sound like a wonderfully happy place. Orange strutted down, walking on air as only a spirit cat could, and set herself down on Amaryllis’ lap and started purring up a storm.“I suspect that we ought to plan our next steps,” Bastion said as he set his fork down. He always ate quickly, as if his meal might slip away at a moment’s notice.“Do you mean the next part of the trip, or the next adventure?” I asked.“I mean the Insmouth dungeon,” Bastion said. Howard looked over at that, and Bastion caught his eye. “Can you tell us more about it?”Howard nodded before pulling a pipe out from his old coat. Clive already had his pipe out and was carefully pushing some stuff in it from a little tin jar on the table. “Our dungeon’s fairly old, but it was never one to grow fast. Three floors for the longest time. Four now. Not too many monsters, but plenty of tricks.”“I see,” Bastion said. “What are the floors like?”“Hmm,” Howard paused as he lit his pipe and took a pull while flicking out a match. It left the room smelling kind of smoky and fruity. Not the worst smell, but not the best. I let my Cleaning aura expand a bit to remove the smell. “The floors are all connected by this long, narrow cave. You can skip a floor, but it’s mighty dangerous.”“Monster types?” Amaryllis asked.“Large fish-like creatures, things with tentacles, and the mist. You can’t really fight the last.” He puffed out a perfect ring into the air. “Your worst enemy is yourself and your friends. The dungeon will always try to challenge your bonds.”The author's narrative has been misappropriated; report any instances of this story on Amazon.“That’s awful,” I said.“How many do you usually go in with?” Bastion asked?“Just myself and the person needing the class,” Howard said. He pulled his pipe out and traced a circle in the air with the mouthpiece. “Three’s fine if they trust each other, but more than that and it gets harder, unless you really trust each other. Still, more people often means moving along faster too. So it’s a balancing act, in the grand scheme of things.”“We’re not just going down with one of us,” I said. “That’s way too dangerous.”“Up to you folk,” Howard said.“Right. So the plan’s pretty simple, I guess. We arrive in town, anchor the Beaver down, then head over to the dungeon right away. The longer we wait, the worse it’ll be. We don’t want to go too fast, because that’s dangerous, so we want to start as soon as we can. Maybe we bring some supplies to last a day or so.”“Only takes an afternoon to clear it,” Howard said.“It might take longer now,” I said. “We don’t know that yet, so it’s best to over-prepare.”There were nods all around.“I think it’ll be... um, I need to be there for the Cleaning magic. Amaryllis should be there to lightning things, and Awen to mechanic things, and Bastion because he’s fun. And Howard, of course, to act as a guide and local expert.” I nodded, very much pleased with my leadership abilities when it came to picking out a good team.“You idiot, you just want us to be there because you think this is some big adventure,” Amaryllis said.“Isn’t it?”Awen nodded. “It is.”“Hmph,” Amaryllis hmphed. “Well, whatever. As long as we get this over with. We’re a few days behind. We were supposed to arrive in Sylphfree the day after tomorrow. A quick glance at any map will reveal that we’re some three days away now, if we fly straight over right away.”“Ah, but we were going to be a week early, right?” I asked.“Yes, and that’s not worth anything if we arrive a week late,” Amaryllis snapped.I shrugged. “Alright. So, who wants to help me with the dishes!” I asked as I stood.The room cleared pretty quickly after that, only Awen staying behind to help me pick up. I, of course, cheated with Cleaning magic, because doing the dishes wasn’t actually fun at all unless you were doing them with someone.“Ah, I think I should run back to do some work,” Awen said. “My crossbow needs some maintenance. I had some ideas for it, but we won’t have time for that before we arrive in Insmouth.”“Anything I can help with?” I asked.Awen shook her head. “No, it’s fine. I might look around town to buy some supplies. We have some here, but I’d feel safer with more, in case the Beaver needs repairs.” She blinked , then looked my way. “Is there anything you need, Broc? I can tinker now. Sometimes I just don’t know what to make though.”“Hmm,” I said. I didn’t want to say ‘nothing’ that wouldn’t be too nice, not when Awen seemed so eager to actually put her skills to some use. But there wasn’t too much that I actually needed, not for adventuring. Maybe for my role as captain? “Oh! I need a cool telescope,” I said.“A telescope? Like, to see things?”“Yup. All good captains have one, it’s a staple, right up there with a cool pet. Usually that’s a parrot or a monkey, but I think Orange fits there.”The cat in question glanced my way from her spot on my seat at the head of the table. I think she was just there because it was warm.Once everything was tucked away, Awen said she’d be heading to her workshop, so I gave her a quick hug-for skill practice and because hugs-then I checked over my collection of teas before picking a couple and setting them aside. Then it was back onto deck.I jumped to helping the others when I saw that Clive was starting to pull the Beaver around a rather tight turn. It only took a glance towards Insmouth a bit to the north to see why. We hadn’t overshot the village, exactly, but it was a near thing.Sails snapped, the propeller hissed and the engine rumbled below deck while the Scallywags and the harpies and I ran around getting everything in order to aim back towards the town. Soon enough we were stowing the sails, slowing down as best we could to coast in over the town.It was past mid-day, and out in the bay little fishing boats were bobbing along, a few of them already heading back into the docks with their day’s catch.The people of Insmouth must have been expecting to see the Beaver because we barely warranted more than a glance as we came to a stop over a nearby clearing and dropped anchor.The airship tugged at the anchor chain and bobbed about for a bit until it settled down. The engines idled and Clive ordered the crew to run a quick inspection of the lines and sails.“An inspection?” I asked.“Aye,” the old harpy said. “If we’re going to be sitting here for the evening, might as well ensure that everything’s in working order. Can’t do that well while we’re in full flight.”“Right,” I said. One of these days I’d get the hang of it. For now though, I had more pressing things to look forward to.My friends came up, one at a time, and soon all of us were gathered on deck, backpacks on and equipment ready for another adventure. It was time to do our part to save... maybe not the world, but at least this little corner of it!
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Chapter Two Hundred and Nine — Not the Hero We Need, But Not the Hero We Deserve
Chapter Two Hundred and Nine — Not the Hero We Need, But Not the Hero We Deserve “My name is Emmanuel Aldelain Von Chadsbourne, and I am here to help!”My friends and I all stopped where we were, that was, right in the middle of the main thoroughfare of Insmouth. The fishy people of the town were going about their business, though quite a few of them were looking our way.Maybe it was seeing four explorers all geared up for an adventure. Maybe it was to see if Howard was alright.Probably it was the cervid standing across from us.I had only seen a few of the deer-people, and that had been a while ago, way back when I was still working on becoming Amaryllis’ friend.This one seemed... different than the obviously military-minded cervid I’d met.He-I assumed it was a he, what with the great antlers splaying out of his head and poking out proudly above-was a couple of feet taller than me, with a puffed up chest and a dignified bearing. He had nice armour on, with a big pauldron and a cuirass that looked like it was made of some sort of leather. His sides and flanks were covered in more of the same, with gilding here and there to make the armour look that much fancier.“And who are you?” Amaryllis asked. She sounded like she was on the wrong side of tense which... yeah, that made sense. She didn’t have the best of experiences with cervid before. I placed a hand on her shoulder, reminding her that I was still there if she needed emergency hugs or anything like that.The cervid blinked. He seemed momentarily confused, but that soon passed as he puffed out his chest even more. “I am Emmanuel Aldelain Von Chadsbourne. Adventurer, fighter, lover of women of all sorts! The fine people of this quaint town have told me that some other intrepid adventurers had come and were offering to assist! I, never one to shy away from sharing in the glory that comes from helping those in need, have waited here to see them.”“Oh,” I said. “Well, we’re adventurers too!”The cervid’s eyes lit up. “Truly?” he asked. “What are your guild ranks, if I may ask? Which branch are you from? I am aware of very few women adventurers.”I shook my head. “We’re part of the exploration guild,” I said.Emmanuel Aldelain Von Chadsbourne’s... Emmanuel’s expression dropped. “Ah, yes I suppose that makes sense. Not as glorious as the great adventurer’s guild, but I suppose it is a little safer.”“I guess?” I tried. “Anyway, it’s nice to see others out and about trying to help people!”Emmanuel nodded. “Of course. I have the power, the skill, and the good fortune to be born able to help others, to be able to act as a hero. It would be the height of insult for me not to take up such a mantle.”Clapping my hands, I cheered him on. “Yeah! That’s the spirit!”My friends were giving me some looks, but they just didn’t understand. Mister Aldelain Von Chadsbourne was doing the right thing, which meant that he should be praised for it. All too often people that tried their best to help went without notice.The cervid bowed our way. “Thank you, little miss. Now, not that I wish to ignore such beautiful woman, but I was told that there was a group on its way to assist this town in its time of need. Are they aboard that vessel?”“Oh, yeah, that’s us,” I confirmed.He eyed us all. “The sylph I could imagine, perhaps,” he muttered.Amaryllis huffed, a very ‘this person is an idiot and is wasting my time’ kind of huff. It was one she’d used on me a few times. “Can we get going? I’d like to see this dungeon thing handled before the day’s up.”Awen and Bastion seemed eager to agree.“Ah, well,” I said. “It was nice meeting you, Emmanuel Aldelain Von Chadsbourne, we’ll be off now!”“Pardon me,” he said, his smile becoming a little fixed. “But did I misunderstand your intent to try and fix this town’s dungeon issue?”“Yup,” I said. “That’s what we’re here for.”“Ah, but I too, am here for the same thing. There is no need for any of you young ladies to risk yourselves with this onerous task, not when Emmanuel Aldelain Von Chadsbourne is on the job!”“No, it’s okay,” I said. “We don’t need the help. I think just the four of us will be more than enough. Unless you know something about Evil Roots?”“Evil Roots? Ah, you mean the...” Emmanuel leaned forwards a little, his voice dropping. “The creature these superstitious villagers speak of?”“It’s less a creature and more a very violent weed,” I said.Emmanuel chuckled. “You believe them?”“Well, we’ve fought Evil Roots before, so yes?” I said. I was trying to mask my confusion, but I wasn’t trying that hard. Really, we’d only just stepped off the Beaver to head over to Insmouth’s dungeon, with Howard acting as our guide, when Emmanuel stepped up before us. It was a bit strange. “Anyway, we’re off!”I started leading us around Emmanuel. Howard shrugged and stepped up and ahead of us a moment later.“Ah, wait, wait a moment,” Emmanuel said before spinning around and trotting up alongside us. “I shall accompany you. I’m certain that if a crew such as yours are able to take care of these Evil Roots, then they’ll be no challenge with someone like myself by your side.”“I think we’re okay,” I said.“Awa, maybe you can go see if someone else needs saving?” Awen asked.The cervid cleared his throat. “Nonsense! When you find someone in need, it’s your duty as a hero to assist as best you can!”“How did you even end up here?” Amaryllis asked. “We’re on the far side of the Hoofbreaker forest, and I don’t recall cervids being welcome at the Grey Wall.”Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.“Historically, that may be true, but the Crys aren’t so cruel as to deny access to a single intrepid hero,” Emmanuel said. “And Emmanuel Aldelain Von Chadsbourne is nothing if not a hero!”Bastion sighed. “I think the young miss was trying to politely steer you towards an issue that you can solve without interfering with our own business,” Bastion said.“Nonsense! A hero of my caliber does not get in the way. He paves the way. A way for a better tomorrow!”“Yeah!” I agreed.“Stop cheering him on, you dolt,” Amaryllis said. “We’re trying to encourage him to leave.”“But why? I mean, yeah, we probably don’t need the help in the dungeon, but he doesn’t seem mean. And I guess if he is suspicious, then it would probably be best if we kept him close, right?”“Emmanuel Aldelain Von Chadsbourne is not suspicious, he is heroic!”Amaryllis gave me a very flat look. “He’s very suspicious.”I glanced back at the cervid, hesitated for just a moment, then asked him a question. “Can I use Insight on you?” I asked.“Certainly!” he said.A cervid Hero of the White Tail, level 20, proud of himself.“He’s a little strong, I guess,” I said. Bastion had question marks to his name. Stronger than us by level alone, but not so strong that he was a big threat, especially if we all worked together.Emmanuel chuckled. “You wound me, young bun. I am still young, and I still have a few adventures left in me before I grow strong enough to defend everyone that needs it.”“Hmm,” I said. “Well, I think Awen’s probably right. I don’t think we’ll need any help in the Insmouth dungeon, but if we do, it’s nice to know that we have someone to call upon.”Emmanuel tapped at his chin. “No, I believe I shall insist upon accompanying you.”“Insist?” Amaryllis asked. She sounded a bit dangerous there.“Indeed! What hero would leave a group of young maidens alone in such a vile and dangerous place as a dungeon. If you won’t allow me to convince you to stay away from such a place, then I will accompany you. There might be monsters and vile creatures within, nothing that a young lady ought to bet her fragile constitution against!”“Pretty sure my constitution’s pretty good,” I said. “That’s like the resilience stat, right? Mine’s at fifty-five.”“That’s not terribly high, actually,” Amaryllis said.“My classes are both more flexibility-based,” I admitted.“That’s the spirit,” Emmanuel said. “The physical stats are often the most useful in tackling the sorts of problems a hero must face in their day-to-day! They keep you healthy and hardy and able to tackle the greatest foe and save those damsels in distress!”I stared at Emmanuel. He was very excitable. “What’s the male equivalent of a damsel?”“Pardon?”“Like, a prince? I mean, I was just thinking, what if that’s what you have to save?”Amaryllis hummed. “A prince in peril? That preserves the alliteration.”“A prince isn’t the same as a damsel though,” Awen said.“I think that would just be a bachelor,” Bastion said.“I can’t think of any words that mean ‘in trouble’ that start with the same letter as that,” I said. “I should get a thesaurus.”“Yes, because that’s what you need to carry around while dungeon diving,” Amaryllis said. “In case you run into any synonym-based traps.”“I bet there’s a wordplay dungeon somewhere on Dirt,” I said.“I have the impression that your group isn’t taking this adventure very seriously,” Emmanuel said.“Huh? Of course we are,” I said. “Can’t you tell how nervous we are?”The cervid looked at me, then to all of my friends. “I’m afraid that I haven’t spent enough time with the lesser species to learn to read their body language. Your banter certainly doesn’t seem very nervous.”“Lesser species?” I repeated.“The cervid are idiots who, in their foolishness, believe that they’re better than everyone else,” Amaryllis said.“Oh,” I replied. Just some casual specism, then. “Well, whatever. Our banter’s meant to try and make each other laugh, because making someone laugh makes you laugh, and laughter’s a great way to unwind and relax. If you’re going to be doing something stressful, it's best to start with the best foot forward. So we banter.”“I see, yes,” Emmanuel said. “That makes sense. Perhaps I should join in your banter as well.”“I don’t know if you could manage,” Amaryllis said.“Of course, if some girls can do it, then certainly Emmanuel Aldelain Von Chadsbourne, saviour of women and hero to all men, can manage!”“Uh, your confidence is great, but you might want to tone down the misogyny? A lot?” I asked.“Awa, it is a bit rude.”“Forgive me?” the cervid said. “I am not entirely certain of how I insulted you, dear ladies, but I know how fragile a woman’s heart can be, and it wouldn’t behoove me not to apologize.”I looked to my friends and got deadpan looks and shrugs in return.“Right, well,” I said. “Howard, where’s the dungeon’s entrance?”“Ah, it’s just outside of town a little ways. It looks a bit like a shed, actually. We placed our graveyard there,” the fishman said.“Why did you do that?” Awen asked.“So that the mana from our dearly departed may return to the world by means of the dungeon. It’s just over here now.”“Let’s see about those Evil Roots then!” I said. And to myself, I wondered about what to do about our new cervid hanger-on.
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