Chapter Twenty — A Ribbiting Meeting
I took a deep breath, raring to start talking to my new potential friends. I had so many things to say. Entire days of pent up talking ready to be unleashed. Instead, all that escaped my lips was a breathy giggle. I flushed, coughed into my closed fist, and tried again.“Hello! My name is Broccoli Bunch and I want to be your friend. Welcome to this forest, do you come here often? What’s it like being a frog person? Wait, no, was that racist? Specieist? I’m sorry I’ve never met someone who wasn’t human before and I don’t know how to act around you so if I’m accidentally rude please tell me and I’ll try to fix it!”I slapped a hand over my mouth and tried to think of ways to not embarrass myself any further when the frog-person-the grenoil?-with the more articulate armour spoke out. “Hail, human,” he said while raising an empty palm my way.“Do all humans speak zat much?” the other grenoil said.The ranger shook his head. “Shush, Donat.” Focusing back on me, he nodded his head and made a gesture with both arms that I couldn’t decipher. “We weren’t expecting to see a friendly face, human. What brings you to zese dark woods?”“I’m lost,” I said, a little sheepishly. “I kind of just ended up here and I’ve been following this road to try and find people for a couple of days now. Then I found you, so I guess that plan worked out!”“Indeed,” the ranger agreed.“So is it just the two of you? Not that there’s anything wrong with there being just two of you. I’m all alone and that’s... well it’s alright, I guess. But what I mean to ask is, are there even more people around here? A town or a city or a big gathering place of people? I have some things I’d like to sell, and I want to learn more about this place. And I want to eat something that isn’t honey. Oh, and I want to make even more friends.”The ranger raised one webbed hand and I stopped. I might have been talking a lot. “You can come back to our camp with us,” he said. “Zere are others there zat might want to take a look at you.”“We’re going to bring it back with us?” the fencer asked.“What are our other options? Let it leave and perhaps jeopardize ze expedition?” Ranger said before shaking his big wide head. His hood didn’t move much with the motions, which was a little strange.“Donat, get behind it. I’ll take ze lead,” the Ranger said.“Oh, I’m being escorted!” I said. “So, do these woods belong to your people? Was I trespassing? I’m sorry if that’s the case.”So, the younger-looking grenoil was called Donat. I waved at him then started walking down the path which they had done a good job of clearing of brush. It was still uneven, with roots poking through the cobbles and making the large flat stones sit all crookedy across the path.“Zese woods belong to no kingdom,” the ranger said. “None that still stands. Now please be quiet, we don’t need to attract trouble.”“But I only found you two because you were talking so loud,” I said.“Exactly.”I adjusted my gambeson and coat and tried to make myself presentable, then fired off a few small cleaning spells to make sure I was nice and neat. The ranger and Donat didn’t seem to notice, or if they did they didn’t mind.Maybe I could help them clean up later too, their boots were all muddy and there was a certain smell to them that kind of hinted that they needed a bath. Not that I would say that to anyone, it was very rude.We started walking and I was about to introduce myself when Donat started talking. “So, uh, ze human, it’s a man human, right?”“No, you idiot, it’s a female,” the ranger said. “Did you hatch yesterday. Look at ze lumps on its chest.”“I zought zose were muscles,” Donat said.I looked down at my chest, then back around to stare at Donat.“Ah, chests are taboo with humans, right?”The ranger sighed. “Just with ze female humans. Zey compete with each other to see who has ze biggest because it helps zem attract mates. Zey don’t croon at each other. Well, some do, but it’s not ze same.”“Weird.” Donat was tilting his head from one side to the other, his entire upper body following the motion since he didn’t really have much of a neck. “Why are zey taboo?” he asked me.“It’s because... they just are.” I crossed my arms and tried to find something to say to defend myself, and my chest, while the ranger ahead of me called out.“Oi zere! We’re back.”I looked ahead of the Ranger and felt my grin growing huge. There were more frog-people! Some were sitting around a little clearing along the edge of the road while one of them was setting up a tent. Most were around a small campfire on which a cauldron was hanging off a rack. The wind shifted, and with it came the mouth-watering smell of some sort of stew.One of the frog people was skinning a small critter off to one side. It looked icky, but the thought of eating some fresh meat pushed that aside for now.Donat raced ahead, arm gesturing back in my direction. “Emeric, Arianne, we found a human!” he said.The entire group gathered before me, with only the ranger staying behind me instead of joining the others. I smiled and took them all in.The ranger and Donat I knew already, both in leather armour over perfectly usable clothes. Among the frog people I was now meeting were two that I suspected might be girl frogs. Frogettes? They were slimmer, with smoother skin and faces that weren’t quite as wide, though they seemed taller than the boy frogs. One had armour similar to the ranger, but with articulated metal gauntlets and a shirt made of fine scales.The other was wearing thick cloth robes made of a deep blue material that were open at the front, revealing plain clothes underneath. She had a staff, but was just holding it by her side with familiar ease.A wizard? A wizard!The other two were boy frogs. One in more leather and steel gear, with two swords held by his hips, and the other had strange armour made of overlapping plates over his shoulders and hips, with a helmet that had a sort of U-shaped crest at the front. A samurai frog! All of them except for Donat had bandoleers, kind of like mine but with medals and pins on them.I bowed to the group. “Hello!” I said catching a few of them off guard. “My name is Broccoli Bunch, let’s be friends!”“Oh, swamp-gas, she speaks our tongue,” the younger looking frog-girl said.The samurai turned a glare onto him. “You did not question it before bringing it here?” he asked, voice gruff and no-nonsense. Donat, who I was realizing seemed rather young looking compared to all the rest, backed up a step.“I’m a she, actually,” I said. “And Donat did talk about my chest a lot.”Support the creativity of authors by visiting the original site for this novel and more.One of the frogs, the one with the two swords, made a croaking noise that was similar to a snort.The samurai shook his head. “Donat, your being here is a privilege. It’s not too late to fetch someone else to carry through a dungeon.” I noticed that he pronounced every word very carefully, enunciated every syllable just so.“I’m ze one at fault here,” the ranger said. “I chose to bring ze human to ze camp.”The samurai glared over at the ranger, then huffed. “Very well. Tie it up. Search through its things.”“Eh?” I asked. “I’m sorry mister samurai, but tying people up is not a good way of making friends. I’d even argue that it’s counter productive.”“Cease your yammering,” the samurai said.I took a small step back. There was something pressing against me, a sort of weight that was trying to drag me down and... and I wasn’t going to let this mean samurai frog talk down to me like that. It’s not how things worked. “No.”The samurai was about to turn away when I spoke. He whipped around to stare at me as if I had said something incomprehensible. Then one of the others, the one with the two swords, started chuckling.I crossed my arms. “Mister samurai, if you’re not going to be nice then that’s your prerogative. You won’t make many friends that way, but I won’t tell you how to live your life. But telling me to be quiet and threatening to tie me up won’t intimidate me. I don’t abide by bullies.”Now three of the others were holding back chuckles and the one with the two swords was openly laughing. “Do you know who I am?” The samurai said.“No? How would I, you haven’t introduced yourselves. I’m Broccoli, by the way. In case you didn’t hear.” I waved at the others and some of them waved back. There were some mixed reactions. Donat seemed nervous of the samurai still, the ranger didn’t seem to care either way. The one with two swords waved back and grinned, as did the non-wizard girl frog. The wizard and the others were looking longingly back at the fire and at the stew set next to it.“I am-” the samurai began.“Hey, can I have some stew? I have some things I could trade.”“Oh, what sort of zings?” the one with two swords said.“Ah, honey? I’ve got, oh I’ve got two bottles of wine that I found.” I said, remembering the two bottles I was still carrying with me. “And I have a bunch of herbs. If one of you is an alchemist you might be interested in those. I could make some tea?”“Wine would be nice,” the ranger said.“We will not get drunk on the job!” the samurai roared.“Two bottles shared between seven won’t be enough to get anyone drunk, except maybe ze tadpole,” the ranger said.“Hey!” Donat protested.The group broke up, most moving to the logs around the little fire pit while the non-wizard girl stirred the stew and then poked the brazier with a stick. Donat was pointed to the unmade tents with instructions not to poke his own eyes out. I guess being the youngest in the group wasn’t fun, but maybe he had to learn how to put up the tent.These frog people weren’t humans, but they seemed cultured and nice enough. Their clothes had a professional look to them and were tailored to fit their non-human proportions, so they had to come from a place with tailor-frogs, which meant a larger community out there.“This is highly unprofessional!” the samurai said.“Oh, stuff it, Leo,” the twin-sword frog said. He gestured to a log not too far off to the side. “Sit, friend, and be welcome at our fire. As long as you cause no harm, none shall befall you.”I mentally ‘ohhed’ at how cool that greeting sounded even as I took off my backpack and set it on the ground next to me. “Thank you for sharing your fire. It’s been forever since I’ve seen anyone. Meeting people who are friendly is really nice.”“I can imagine,” he said. “You said you were Broccoli Bunch, yes?” At my nod, he smiled then patted a webbed hand against his chest. “I am Emeric. Ze fine wizard here is Arianne. You met Pierre, our ranger and scout. Ze young lady across from you is Valeria. Our friend at ze tents who likes your chest is Donat, and ze grumpy one is Leo.”“My name is Leonard Chand’nuit,” the samurai said. He shifted the hilt of his big sword around and crouched down on a log next to Emeric. “I will be keeping an eye on you, human. Know that I will not allow you to interfere with this party’s business.”“Okay,” I said. My mind was reeling trying to keep all the names straight. “It’s a pleasure to meet you all. I might have a hard time with all of your names. I hope you don’t mind.”“Hey, it’s no problem,” the frog girl across from me, Valerie said.I fired off a few inspects on each of them in a hurry.A relaxed Sword-Dancer, (level ??)That was Emeric, of course. His class sounded really neat.An amused Marsh Wizard, (level ??)Arianne, whose full lips were curled up in a slight smile.A hungry Fencer, (level ??)That was Valerie, who was eyeing the stew the way a wolf might eye a steak.And then I used Insight on Leonard.A frigid Samurai of the Moonless Night, (Level ???)Three question marks. Did that mean he was even stronger than all the others? That sort of made sense. He certainly felt that he deserved more respect. Maybe being a higher level earned people more honour and such by default? It was... sort of fair. More so than respecting someone because they were rich or born with the right family name.“Ah, you’re all very strong,” I said as I rooted around my bag and pulled out one of the wine bottles I had. I didn’t know anything about wine, but I hoped that it was good. It had been aging for quite some time.I handed the bottle to Arianne, my hand brushing against hers for just a moment. It was moist and kind of slippery, which was a weird but not uncomfortable feeling.“Would you mind if we Observed you?” Emeric asked. “Just as a precaution.”I froze. “Is that like using Insight?” I asked.The wizard next to me laughed, it was a strange, gurgle-y sound. “Insight is a variation of Observe and Inspect, yes,” she said. “It’s a bit of a faux-pas to use zat sort of skill on someone without permission.”“Oh no,” I said before pressing my hands over my face. “I’m so sorry!”Emeric laughed it off, but Leonard next to him narrowed his eyes with suspicion. “It’s nothing,” Emeric said.Arianne looked at me, and then her eyes widened. “She’s a Cinnamon Bun, level four,” she said.That earned me a bunch of looks. “Is that bad?” I asked.“How are you still alive?” Valerie asked.I had the impression that I was going to have to do some explaining.
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Chapter Twenty-One — Tiny Fish Huge Pond
“Um,” I said as I tried to deal with the question. How was I still alive? Was this place really that dangerous? Sure the ghosts were scary, and there were bears and things, maybe, but nothing I had seen topped the evil ghosts or the monsters in the dungeon. “Well, mostly I just fought ghosts, some zombies and that was it, really. I’ve been eating berries and honey for the most part. Is that what you meant?”Arianne shook her head. “Ghosts aren’t too common, but zey are easily dispatched by most. It’s ze sombrals, ze pixies, and ze dryads zat are ze issues here.”I stared at her, then at the others around the fire. Donat had rejoined the circle, plopping himself down right on the ground without even a log to sit on. Emeric was still wearing a smile, but next to him, Leonard the mean samurai was glaring suspiciously. Valerie was the only one ignoring me as she focused on the stew. The ranger was... gone? I couldn’t see him, and I never noticed him leaving. Neat!“Well,” I said. “I never saw any dryads, and I don’t know what sombrals are. I did meet a whole lot of pixies though. They were nice.”“Nice?” Arianne asked. “I have seen zem melt the flesh off of creatures an order of magnitude bigger zan zey are wiz zeir magic. Each pixie has a different and mostly unique set of spells zat zey will use to tear you apart.”“Uh.” I shrugged. “I offered them some honey to let me stay in their territory. Then I gave their leader a second jar to escort me around for a day.”“You-” Emeric started to croak with laughter. “Oh, zat’s priceless. Hear zat, Leo. No need to scare off ze pixies with your big sword. Just give zem honey!”“She could be lying,” the samurai said.I nodded, which set him to blinking at me. “I could be. But that wouldn’t be very nice of me. I have some honey left over, if you want to try it for yourself. It would be a real shame if you hurt the pixies just because of a little misunderstanding.’Arianne looked like she wanted to pat me, but she didn’t which was good. People were always doing that and it was very rude.“Can you tell me about the sombrals and the dryads?” I asked.“Are you going to offer zem some honey as well?” Emeric asked.“I might. But I don’t know what dryads or sombrals eat. Maybe they don’t like honey, or can get some themselves.”“Sombrals,” Arianne began in a tone that sounded an awful lot like some of my teachers. “Are one of the monsters native to the Darkwoods. Dryads, on ze other hand, are common across ze whole world. Zey tend to be wherever zere are large forests. Donat, tell Broccoli about sombrals.”The young grenoil jumped, looked around, then rubbed at his face where his nose would be as a human. “Ah, right, sombrals. Second tier monsters. Scary, big, zey like ze taste of fresh grenoil meat. Do you know what a wolf is?” I nodded and he continued. “Right. sombrals are like wolves if wolves were made of shadows and didn’t need to sleep. Zey aren’t as big as some kinds of wolves, but zat only means zat zey are sneakier.”“And how do you fight zem?” Arianne asked Donat. She was leading him on, making him recite information that he was probably already supposed to know.“Fire works. Zey don’t like it. Light magic is best. But we don’t have zat. Hitting zem on the head works too. Zey are not like ghosts who are immune to physical harm. But zey do resist it better.”“Can’t you just run away?” I asked. I didn’t want to go around booping any poor wolves on the head for doing what was in their nature.“No,” Donat said with a shake of his head. “Sombrals are blind. Zey can’t see. But zeir sense of smell is incredible and zey will hunt you for days if zey must. You can run to find a better place to fight. Or into a town with lots of people if it’s close, but zey can’t be outrun in zis forest. Zey hunt in packs and will try to encircle you if zey can.”“Scary,” I said. “I guess I’m lucky I never ran into them.”“Zat’s the strange part,” Emeric said. “Zey would track you down by your scent. How did you avoid zat?”I thought about it for a few moments, but the answer was pretty obvious. “I am very clean,” I said. “I have the cleaning skill, so I shouldn’t have much of a smell at all.”Emeric blinked his big froggy eyes at me, then tilted back and laughed, his feet thumping on the ground as he croaked and gurgled with mirth.“Tch,” Leonard said. “I would call what you did clever if it was not so obvious that you merely managed to avoid death through sheer dumb luck.”“Now now, Leonard,” Arianne said. “It’s good information to have. We might be able to use it ourselves.”“Stew’s ready!” Valerie declared. “Hey, tadpole, get ze bowls and such.”Donat grumbled, but he ran off to the tents in a hurry at the sight of Valerie’s glare and soon returned with a stack of tin bowls and a handful of wooden spoons. He passed them around, then got shoved aside by Valerie when he reached for the ladle. The frog girl started filling everyone’s bowls, and I got to go first for some reason. Maybe some sort of guest custom.I sat back down, tummy gurgling as I took in deep breaths of the vapours coming off of the stew. It smelled so good my eyes nearly rolled back into my head. Still, I noticed that the others were waiting before digging in.Pierre the sneaky ranger walked out of the woods as if he had just been standing in plain sight all along and took a bowl of his own. He was the last to sit down.“May our wills be the will of the world,” they all intoned at more or less the same time. Then they started digging in.This novel's true home is a different platform. Support the author by finding it there.“You don’t worship the world tree?” Valerie asked between two bites.I shook my head and hoped that wouldn’t cause any troubles. I forgot all about that as I put the spoon in my mouth and the savoury taste of meaty juices and some sort of potato-like root filled my mouth with an explosion of flavour. “This is so good!” I said when I swallowed. I might have burnt my tongue and throat but it was worth it.Valerie made a gesture my way, a sort of thumbs up, but her thumb was webbed and it came out weird. Still, I understood what she meant and didn’t blame her if she didn’t want to stop eating for even a moment.I slurped down a few more bites then started scooping up some of the meat and vegetables out of the juice. Some were crunchy, which was strange, but not too bad.“Needs more roach,” Donat said.“Hard to find out here,” Arianne said.I wondered what they meant. Then I looked into my bowl and saw that thumb-sized and very dead bug in my stew. Another floated up to the surface next to it. “Ah,” I said. I debated losing my supper all over the campfire, but then held back. It had been really good until then. I picked up another bug on my spoon, then placed it in my mouth and chewed.It crunched and crunched and I just couldn’t do it knowing what it was.“I, I’m full,” I lied as I pushed the bowl to Valerie. If there were tears in my eyes at losing such a delicious meal she didn’t comment.The girl smiled wide and took my bowl without protest to chug it all down. Emeric’s eyes were turned up as if to say he knew exactly what had happened and thought it was hilarious.“So, um, dryads?” I asked.“If you run into a dryad, you’ll know,” Leonard said. “They are immensely dangerous, usually past their second tier, though you might find younger ones around. They can kill an entire squadron of ill-prepared troops. But, for the most part, they will not hurt or hunt you if you make an effort to avoid them and are careful about not cutting down trees in their presence.”“So they’re peaceful?” I asked.Arianne shook her head and swallowed. “No. Zey are merely not aggressive. Do not confuse ze two.”“The pixies weren’t aggressive at first and they became friends,” I said. “Maybe you’re just approaching them the wrong way?” I wondered.“Oh, please do try to make friends with a dryad,” Leonard said. “As long as I am there to watch, of course.”I harrumphed and reached into my bandoleer to pull out Orange. The kitty had been sleeping all afternoon, but the motion of taking her out woke her up. She looked around at all the people around us and shook to fluff out her fur.“What’s zat?” Donat asked.“This is Orange,” I said. “She’s a spirit cat.”“Did you find it in ze wild?” Arianne asked as she stared at Orange with an intense look. Her eyes opened wider after a moment. “Ah, a summon.”“What a useless summon,” Leonard said.Orange glared at him.“Watch out Leo, it might scratch you,” Emeric said. “Where did you find a spirit cat? Attracted it with some honey?”“No, I got her from an item,” I said.“Cute,” he replied. “Not zat useful, but a handy companion. And perhaps it will grow into a large and fearsome tabby cat in a decade or two.”“Well I like her,” I said as I pulled Orange in for a quick snuggle. She, being a proper kitty, objected to the display of love and squirmed out of my grasp to run away. She didn’t go far and was soon distracted by some swaying leaves. “So,” I asked as I refocused. “What are you guys doing out here? Is there a village or something nearby?”“I was zinking of asking you ze same. What is a level four Cinnamon Bun, whatever zat may be, doing out in zese woods?” Arianne asked. She set her bowl aside then hugged her staff close, fingers running across the well-worn wood.“I’m a bit lost,” I admitted.Emeric chuckled. “A little, yes. You can stay wiz us tonight. Tomorrow we will point you to Rockstack. It’s a small outpost run by a few guilds. If you’re as clever as you look you’ll be able to find work. Maybe one day you can join the Exploration Guild.”“Is that who you are?” I asked. “Members of an exploration guild?” That sounded so cool! Like an adventurer’s guild, but with less killing rats in someone’s basement and more exploring tombs and looking for cool places.“Zat we are,” Emeric said. “Myself, Arianne, Pierre, and most recently Valerie are all members of ze same exploration team. Leo here is a senior member who joined our team for zis expedition because we’ll be exploring a more dangerous place, and Donat tagged along because we need someone close to reaching zeir class evolution if we find a dungeon.”“So cool,” I said. I now had about a million questions to ask! “What are you guys looking for?”“She isn’t part of our group,” Leonard said. “Don’t spill confidential information.”“She might have come across what we’re looking for. At least she might save us some fruitless searching,” Emeric argued back.The samurai considered this for a moment, then nodded. “Very well.”Emeric smiled triumphantly. “We are looking for a lost town zat was once occupied by humans. Zere is nearly no human presence left here, and it was a frontier town when it fell, so we don’t know where it is. But someone discovered something interesting in zat town and we want to see it.”Frowning, I considered what he’d said. A human town around here. The only one I had seen so far was... “Are you talking about Threewells?” I asked.In a blink there was a hand clasped over each of my shoulders.
