Chapter Forty-Five — Upskirt Down
Chapter Forty-Five — Upskirt Down Green Hold was tiny.Or at least, that was the impression I had of the town from what had to be about three hundred meters in the air.From all the way up on the Silver Boot the houses looked like big rectangles and the walls were only a rough outline around the town. The layout reminded me a bit of Threewells, but with many more homes set around a central square. The area around the town was filled with little farms, most of them with homes close to the roads leading into town.“You kids all have your stuff?” Gabriel asked. He was standing right next to the edge of the deck, heels over the side and his weight on the balls of his feet. The crew had removed part of the railing, the spot where the gangplank had been when we arrived. “We can’t come back to ze ship if you forgot anyzing.”I hefted my pack, certain that I hadn’t left anything behind. Amaryllis who was next to me didn’t have anything to begin with, something that I was growing increasingly nervous about. Was she going to buy all of her gear in-town?I set that aside for the moment and raised my hand.“Yeah?” Gabriel asked as he pulled a flask and took a sip from it.“How are we getting down?” I asked.“Did you ever rappel before?” he asked.“I have,” I said. “But there’s usually something to, ah, kick off of. And a mountain.” Not... oh, we had lowered a bit. Still, that was two hundred meters of empty air.A glance over the side-where I had a railing to lean on-showed that a few people in the town below were eagerly looking up to us.“First time for everyzing,” Gabriel said. He secured his flask to his belt and then kicked a rope off the side. It went taut against the metal bar it had been tied to and the grenoil dropped four handles with little pulleys on them on the ground. “You set zem like zis,” he said before expertly doing something with the device. Then he walked off the edge.France gasped, but I had the opportunity to look down and see that he was slowing down his fall with his rappel. It was still fast, and he didn’t have a harness, but he still made it to the ground without going splat.“Well okay then,” I said as I grabbed one of the other devices and waited for the rope to loosen up enough to grab it.“Just like that?” Amaryllis asked.“Do you want to go at the same time?” I asked right back. “We could hold hands on the way down if you’re afraid.”The girl rolled her eyes and, without so much as picking up her own rappel, she walked off the edge.“Amaryllis!” I screamed.“Ah,” Florian said. “She’s a harpy, she’ll be fine.”I looked over the edge and saw that she was, in fact, perfectly fine. Her arms were outstretched and, while she wasn’t flying exactly, she was slowly drifting towards the ground, the long feathers on the ends of her arms twisting this way and that to control her fall.“Oh,” I said. I felt a bit silly after that. “Well, see you guys at the bottom,” I said as I made sure my rope was taut and that my rappel was secured properly. “Bye Captain!” I called out with a wave.Captain Isaac was near the wheel, but he heard me and gave me a parting wave. “We shall see each other again, winds willing,” he called back.I didn’t have a way to say goodbye that sounded cooler than that, so I just hopped off the side.The rappel went taut, then something went very wrong. The device slowed my fall, a little, but not nearly as much as I wanted to. I screamed as the ground reached up to me and suddenly two hundred meters didn’t look that far away.I shot as much stamina into my legs as I could and at the very last moment prepared to jump.I hit the ground feet first.My stamina went from completely full to just shy of empty.The ground cratered.“Zat was a good landing,” Gabriel said from a few feet away. “But next time, don’t rappel wiz a skirt on unless you want to give ze whole town anozer show.”I squeaked and pushed my skirts down, then I stepped out of the crater I had left in the road. “Did you do that on purpose?” I asked him.“Look at your rear? You’re not my type, dry-skin, pretty blue underzings or otherwise” Gabriel said.“Not that!” I said as my anger warred with my embarrassment to warm up my face. I could have died and I was mightily miffed about it.“Don’t get your panties in a knot,” Gabriel said. “I’d have caught ya if you didn’t catch yourself.”I tightened my fists but didn’t have time to give Gabriel what for before a scream from above had me looking up. France was rushing down towards the ground at a breakneck speed. I shifted, ready to jump up and at least try to catch her when she suddenly glowed and slowed down before landing on her feet with both eyes wide open.Gabriel lowered a hand that had been pointing right at the grenoil. “See?” he said.“You can do magic?” I asked.The older grenoil snorted. “Featherfall. In our line of work you learn how to cast it or you learn how to pick up your insides after zey go splat.”“Right,” I said. I made note of that. My anger had faded a little in the time it had taken to watch him slow down France’s fall.“Go see to your partner. Ze fool girl wanted to leave before the sun set. Not zat I care.”“Oh, okay,” I said before turning around and looking for Amaryllis. The harpy girl had landed at some point, because she wasn’t in the skies above. I took the chance to inspect Green Hold from the ground. It was a simple little town, more homes than Threewells, but most of them had mud walls and they were barely more than a floor tall.Just because they were made of mud didn’t mean they were poorly crafted though. Most of the homes were built into neat squares and they had little gardens out back with flowers blooming within. Red roofs all gleamed in the almost-orange light of the waning evening and the air smelled like firewood and supper, unlike the rancid odour that had permeated Port Royal.This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.I ended up wandering along the main street until I found an irate Amaryllis waiting before what looked like the town’s inn, arms crossed and talon tapping at the ground. “You finally decided to show up. Good. Let’s go,” she said before bending down and picking up a bag that had a bedroll and tent tied to the top.“We’re leaving already?” I asked. “And where were you hiding that? Do you have an inventory?”“An inventory? I’m not giving you a list of my belongings,” she said. “And yes, obviously we’re leaving now. The sooner we get this over with the better.”I didn’t sigh because that would have been rude, but I certainly felt like sighing. I had kind of hoped that we could become friends but so far that hope had turned into mush.I followed after Amaryllis as she aimed for the town gates.No. No I couldn’t just give up. “I won’t give up.”“You won’t give up what?” the harpy girl asked.“I won’t give up on trying to be your friend, even if sometimes you’re a little rude,” I said.The girl stopped a few steps ahead of me and gave me a look so filled with confusion that my determination to become her friend soon turned into determination not to giggle in her face. “My partner is an idiot,” she said before walking on.“I’m not an idiot. We just think differently,” I said.She huffed as she marched out of the gates, the man on guard duty not even giving us more than a passing look. “Different is right. Your intelligence stat must be in the negatives you’re so different.”“There’s an intelligence stat?” I asked.“And you’re gullible too.” She stopped and looked around, then pulled a tiny compass from an inner pocket of her leather jacket. “North and East,” she said.“You know where the fort is?”“Unlike someone, I purchased a map. You do know what a map is, don’t you?”“Being rude won’t stop me from becoming your friend,” I said, a huge grin splitting my features when Amaryllis turned to glare at me. I only smiled harder.“Tch.” She stomped off along the road, head darting this way and that as we moved out of the area with little farms and into what was almost a forest. Almost, because for every tree there was a deep puddle of brackish water.The bugs must have sensed us and they knew that we were a snack, because soon enough there were swarms of mosquitoes flying our way. I stopped and searched my bag until I found my bug-repelling rune, the one I had purchased in Port Royal. It came with a thin leather strap that made it easy to wear as a bracelet. A bit of mana pushed into it and the bugs coming our way suddenly whooshed back.“Hrm. Not completely useless,” she muttered.“I strive to not be completely useless,” I said as I pulled out a runelight next. It came with a handy strap that went around the head, but it fit around the brim of my cool hat just right. It wasn’t full dark yet, but it was getting dark enough that a bit more light would be appreciated. I pinched the tip of my tongue between my teeth and focused. A second trickle of mana had a cone of light flashing out ahead of us.Health 120/120Stamina 31/125Mana 109/115I made a note to keep an eye on my mana reserves. Maybe I could cycle the bug-repelling rune.Amaryllis snapped her arm to the side and a knife appeared in her hand, a strange leaf-shaped blade that had two tines at the end instead of a point. She glared at it and then the tip lit up like a flashlight.“Neat,” I said.“Even an idiot ought to be able to use a spell like that,” she said.I smiled, happy that she was willing to talk, at least. “You’re a lightning mage, right?”“Thunder mage,” she corrected.I fired a stealthy Insight at her.An irate Thunder Mage, level 9.So, she was three levels ahead of me, which probably meant that she had at least one more class skill. I was willing to bet that she had skills that were way cooler than Cleaning and Cute.Especially Cute.“So, is thunder-aspect mana close to light?” I asked as I scanned the marshes around us. They were surprisingly noisy, with frogs croaking and bugs humming and the occasional splash or gurgle from the water. As the sky darkened even more my paranoia went up a notch.“It’s adjacent, yes,” she said.“So it’s only two steps away from Cleaning magic?”“I do not use that kind of peasant magic,” she huffed.I shook my head at that. Cleaning was useful. I mean, it wasn’t fireball, but it was alright.We reached an area where the road forked and Amaryllis pulled a small map from a side pocket of her backpack. “I think there’s a spot that’s a little dryer up ahead.”“We can set up camp then,” I said. “It’ll be hard to light a fire around here.”“Best not to then. It would attract the slimes.”The what?But I didn’t have time to ask as she kept on moving and I had to jog to follow behind her. As it turned out, she had been right about the dry spot. It was just a more elevated position that overlooked some of the swamp around us, but it was a bit farther from the many little tributaries running down from the east.We set up only one tent, both of us quiet after Amaryllis insisted that we use her superior gear for the night.And then, after flipping a copper and drawing first watch, I was left alone again. It was okay. I was making steady progress. I knew that in no time at all Amaryllis would dislike me a little less!Congratulations! Through repeated actions your Friendmaking skill has improved and is now eligible for rank up!Rank D is a free rank
Chapter Forty-Six — A Slimey Situation
Chapter Forty-Six — A Slimey Situation “Wake up!”I shifted around, turning my back to the noise that had disturbed me.“Wake up you blasted idiot!” Someone hissed before I got a rough shove against my shoulder.“Huu?” I asked as I looked around and tried to piece things together. It took awhile for the memories to return and for the sleep to wear off. I had gotten first watch, which meant I got to listen to Amaryllis’ cute whistling snores again while hugging my knees in the near-dark.She had told me not to play with any magic because it attracted monsters, so I had basically spent a few hours all alone in the dark with nothing to do. No lights to read by and just the sky to watch. At least so far from any civilised places the skies had been truly spectacular. It was easy to look up to them and just... drift away.Then Amaryllis had relieved me and I got to go to sleep on her surprisingly soft mattress in a tent that I was pretty sure was enchanted to make a person sleep really well. Or maybe I was just really tired.“Wake up you moron!”Thunder boomed.The ground skipped out from under me.I screwed my eyes shut and let out a squeak as any hints of sleepiness fled.The flash faded away as suddenly as it had come and we were left in the dark once more. “My night vision is shot,” Amaryllis said.“What’s going on?” I asked as I scrambled to my feet, bumped against the walls of the tent, then stumbled out into the spot we had chosen to camp in. It was still completely dark out, without even the barest hint of sunlight on the horizon.“Get your gear; leave the tent,” Amaryllis said. “Slimes!”“Slimes?” I asked. Some part of me, still mostly asleep, wanted to flop down and go right back to napping, but an electric buzz startled me and I looked up to see Amaryllis, both wings glowing with static sparks and hair-feathers standing on end.She flung an arm out, her little knife held at the end, and a long forking jolt of lightning shot out and into the marshes.I stared at the creature it hit.The thing was big and bulbous, wobbly, and most of all, dirty. It was as if someone had taken the biggest ice-cream scoop in the world to a bowl of jello, then rolled the ball in some mud and twigs.An unemotional Marsh Slime, level 8.Electric shocks ran across its body and it seemed to wilt on the spot. Then another rolled out of the woods, and another came after it.I rushed to the tent, grabbed my backpack to fling it on, picked up Orange, plopped my hat on, and grabbed my spear. An afterthought had the rune-light at the front come on to illuminate our surroundings.“Oh no,” I said.“We need to make a run for it,” Amaryllis said. “There are too many to kill.”“You were going to kill them?” I asked as I watched the dozens of slimes that had surrounded us as I slept. I couldn’t blame Amaryllis for not noticing them sooner, other than that gurgling sound they made while moving they were hard to spot against the marshy ground. “What if they’re nice?”“Nice? They’re slimes!”“They could be nice slimes?”“All they do is eat things. They don’t even have brains! World smite me, you could pass for one of them.” Amaryllis’ arm shot out and another bolt of sizzling electricity shot out and splattered a tiny, basketball-sized slime that had bounced towards them. “Follow the road north!” she said before running off the little cliff we were on.I followed, leaping off the ground with a burst of stamina that had me overshooting Amaryllis and landing on the path. A flash of my light on the road ahead revealed that it wasn’t quite cleared, with a few slimes blubbering about, but not so many that we couldn’t avoid them.The path towards Green Hold, on the other hand, had far fewer.“South?” I called out, pointing to the easier path.“No, North,” Amaryllis said as she landed and immediately started running that way.I followed, stumbling a bit as I got used to the weight of my pack, but I caught up with a few quick bounces. We avoided the bigger slimes, both of us taking to the air to pass over them even as they sent out little slimy tendrils to try and catch us.I thought we were in the clear when I heard a ‘whump’ and Amaryllis disappeared from my side.My feet dug into the dirt road with a scrape as I stopped and whipped around.Amaryllis was on the ground, electrified hand slapping at a large gooey tentacle wrapped around her face and neck. A huge, bulbous slime gooped out of the nearest tree, still hanging onto Amaryllis as it moved towards her.I ran at her. First trying to pull her away from the monster, but when that didn’t work I slapped a hand against the slime, then winced as it felt as if I had stuck my hand in a pot of hot water. It prickled against my skin and I caught a faint burning odour in the air. “Clean!” I screamed as I fired the quickest cleaning spell I could muster.The tentacle burst apart into motes of light and Amaryllis stumbled onto her knees, gasping.“Here,” I said as I pulled out the trifecta potion I had in my bandoller and pushed it into her hands.The slime grabbed me, a long limb slithering around my waist.“Oh no you don’t,” I said.Mister Menu flashed before me.CleaningRank C — 100%The ability to Clean. You are exceptionally good at tidying up and washing off. Effectiveness of cleaning is marginally increased. You may now use mana to clean things you touch.Eligible for rank up!Rank B costs two (2) Class Points“Yes!” I said.It was a long overdue upgrade, and I still had two more class points to spend. Really, I should have done it a while ago but there had never been a reason until now.CleaningRank B -00%The ability to Clean. You are exceptionally good at tidying up and washing off. Effectiveness of cleaning is marginally increased. You may now use mana to clean things you see.If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen. Please report the violation.Things I could see? I brought my arm up and aimed it at the slime. “Clean!” I’d come up with cooler attack names later.I felt my mana rushing into my hand, then it formed into a tight ball, hundreds of swirling strands of interwoven magic, like a three dimensional kaliedeoscope. The ball burst forwards and slammed into the slime with a dull thud, like a potato canon smacking a brick wall.The slime exploded.I stumbled back, gasping as the bits of slime still on me faded away. That had cost a chunk of mana but it had certainly been worth it.Congratulations! You have caused Marsh Slime, Level 9, to get washed! Bonus Exp was granted for splattering a monster above your level!I sighed, but my relief was cut off as more gurgles came from the forest around us. “Come on, we need to go,” I said as I crouched down next to Amaryllis.“I’m fine,” she said before pushing me off. She got to her feet on her own and shook her head. “It merely caught me by surprise.”“It happens,” I said. “You’ll have to show me those spells of yours some time, they were awesome!”“Yes well, that spell, that was a cleaning spell?”“Yup! I’ve got it to Rank B! Um, I mean, journeyman.”“It was adequate,” Amaryllis said, which set me to beaming. She huffed and turned away. “Let’s keep moving. Marsh slimes are mostly nocturnal. There are still some hours of night left.”We did just that, first jogging along then slowing down to a steady walk after we both stumbled one to many times on the puddle-covered and uneven road. I got to practice my new and improved cleaning spell a few times too. It seemed as if it came with a sort of ingrained knowledge on how to fire it, either as a ball-like projectile or a bigger cone. The latter took a lot of mana, but it was fun to use. Like a flame thrower but for cleanliness.Firing big bursts of cleaning magic at the littler slimes that tried to jump at us was a fair bit of fun, and even Amaryllis joined in, blasting them out of the air with well-aimed shocks and crackling electrical whips.The sky started to lighten to a paler blue and the marshes changed, the slimes receding away and into the swampy waters while birdsong filled the air and all sorts of animals came awake. “We made it,” I said as I stumbled to a stop.I was running on a couple of hours of sleep and had been walking and using magic for the past couple of hours. My batteries were all spent.“We have,” Amaryllis said. “There are some rocks over there. We can take a break. Eat.”I followed her pointing finger to find a big hill with a few stones jutting out of it. It was just off the road a little ways. “Alright,” I said, too tired to voice any other opinions. “You don’t have your pack though. But, we can share the food I have.”She snorted and shook her head as she took off.I checked my notifications, making sure to do so quietly because the last thing I wanted was for Amaryllis to think I was the sort of crazy person that talked to her system menu.Congratulations! You have committed minor genocide! Your kill tally amounts to:Marsh Slime, Level 1 x 4Marsh Slime, Level 2 x 2Marsh Slime, Level 3 x 3Marsh Slime, Level 4 x 1Marsh Slime, Level 5 x 1For refusing to spare the children you have been granted Bonus Exp!“Ah,” I said. “Ah... ah-ah. Ah!”Amaryllis stared at me, pausing halfway up the hill. “Did your last two braincells bounce apart?”“I... ah,” I explained. Then, because words were failing me, I made gestures.“If you need to piss just go behind a bush.” She sniffed. “It’s not exactly luxurious, but this place is already a swamp.”“Ah!” I tried again. There was a sting in my eyes as tears gathered.Congratulations! Through repeated actions your Cute skill has improved and is now eligible for rank up!Rank C costs one (1) Class Point“Ahhhh!”“And you’ve lost your mind,” Amaryllis said. She dragged me the rest of the way up the hill, then pushed me down onto a rock. “You sit there and... keep doing... whatever.”“Ah,” I squeaked back.“Right... and thanks. You know, for back there. I’ll pay you back for the trifecta potion.”She moved off to the centre of the hill and I saw her bringing her feathery arm over her head to mask her face from the sunlight.“Th-the slimes,” I said. “Were they sapient? Sentient? Do they have little slime homes and little slime families?”“What? No. They’re made from concentrations of ambient mana. It takes a particular kind of mana to make them. Then they roll around and stick to anything magical they run across, including people. They’re a nuisance.”“Oh, okay,” I said.It still took a while, and maybe a dab at my eyes, to really calm myself down. Knowing that the slimes weren’t people made it... better. Not okay, but better.“We can see the fort from here,” Amaryllis said. “It’s actually quite close. I think the scale on my map is off.”I sniffled, then fired a cleaning spell at my face, which tingled and made me sneeze, but at least it cleared my nose up. “Um. We were sent to map out the fort’s location. Where did you buy the map?”“It’s from the Golden Nest Bank. They’re a Nesting Kingdom institution, can’t blame them for being wrong about misplacing such an ugly building.”I climbed up the hill so that I was next to her and took in the distant form of Fort Frogger. It was a large squarish building some ways away, with a single stubby tower and dull grey walls around it, most of them looked cracked and broken even from afar.And between us and the fort was a good couple of kilometers of swampland.It wasn’t going to be fun getting there.
