Ravensdagger_The_Isekai_Will_be_Livestreamed

The Isekai Will be Livestreamed

Annotation

When Jake was offered the chance to become a hero in another world, to escape his dull life, he only asked one thing, “Can it be livestreamed?” only for a Mom-entuous mistake to cause him to Ms his journey.

An Audience-Interactive Quest!

[Participant in the Royal Road Writathon challenge!]

The Isekai Will be Livestreamed

Prologue

Game Rules

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

The Isekai Will be Livestreamed

Prologue

Prologue Jake smiled into his webcam. "Alright, thanks for coming to today's stream Chat, I hope you enjoyed it!" he said.The view counter, sitting on his second screen and right under the loading screen for an old single-player FPS, went from 4 to 3.One of those was him. So that meant... he had a whole two viewers.

Twinge Chat!

www,EroticHorsePlay,gg/BigBlack says: Want bigger pp? Buy viarga, and other medication! Free shipping! Go to: Big,BiggerPP,com! Special promocode: biggerpp001! For 10% discont!!

CorvidWithASword says: Don't worry Jake, things will get better! Keep at it!

Jake's eyes glazed over the first line from chat. That same spam bot has been repeating the same message for hours. He thought of banning it, but it meant one more viewer, and viewers attracted more viewers.Also, it was something to make fun of if he ran out of jokes. Which was always.The second message was... sus as fuck."Okay, well bye," he said. He clicked the orange Steam End button, and returned to Twinge's homepage. Dozens of little rectangles, with live footage of games being played and of Vtubers... vtubing, were filling the page. Each with view counters that registered in the hundreds of thousands. One or two hit the low millions, even though it was only just noon.Jake leaned back into his cool, and very unergonomic chair, and pressed his palms into his eyes. They always burned when he looked at his screens for too long.He was eighteen, living with his mom, and unemployed. College was... not an option. Work was a pipe dream. He didn't have what more boring people would call 'marketable skills' and the job market was shit besides.So he pursued a dream, of becoming a zit-faced internet gaming celebrity.So far, his record was 22 viewers on one stream. Not at the same time, just 22 unique people over the course of a six-hour Ring: Combat Involved marathon.He opened his eyes, then froze.

Jake Maia: What Are Your Conditions to Save the World of Moeder?

The box floated there, slightly fuzzy on the edges and hovering in the way a magic text box probably shouldn't.Jake shook his head. Too much Blue Bull?The box was still there when he opened his eyes again it was still there. "What?" he asked. The box flickered and reappeared.

Jake Maia: The World of Moeder Requires a Champion. Were You To Accept This Role, What Would Your Conditions Be?

This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author's consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.His mouth worked. "Uh," he said. "Like, what kind of conditions can I put?" he questioned his senility, but if anyone heard... well, he had been live-streaming a moment ago. "Can it be live streamed?" he muttered.

Jake Maia, Your Condition Has Been Set!Step Within the Portal and to a World of Adventure!

A portal opened next to him. A blazing hole in the universe, at once paper-thin and with a depth that, on gazing within, had Jake's heart pounding.Should he? It was stupid, probably a pipe-dream. This kind of stuff only happened in the trashy sort of anime he'd been mocked for watching once. But if it was real... adventure and heroism, an escape from all the crap that was going on. Actual success!He swallowed. Big tiddied elf girls!His hand shook as he reached out towards the portal.The door knocked. "Sweetie, are you talking to your friends online?" his mom asked."Mom, I'm, uh, I'm," he stuttered.The door opened. "If you're not busy," she said from behind a head-high pile of clothes. "I've cleaned all of your undies. I even folded them for you.""Mom!" he called out.She stepped in, and then, as if in slow motion, he watched her foot catch on a pair of jeans, one that he'd tossed aside so it wouldn't be visible on his webcam.His mom squeaked. The clothes she held went flying, and the woman stumbled forwards.Jake saw her eyes widen a moment before her flailing arm reached out and touched the portal.There was a 'slorp' kind of sound."Mom?"Jake stepped over to where the portal had been. Now, there was only a pile of folded socks and tighty-whities."Oh, shit," he muttered. Something on the edge of his vision moved, and he stared at his main monitor where his Twinge had... changed. There was a stream going on now, live, of a forest. In the centre of it was his mother, kneeling over and breathing hard.Jake blinked."Mom?!"

* * *

Anne stared at the prompt in front of her, then at the floating box next to that. It looked strangely familiar, at least compared to all the rest of the stuff in the endless void she found herself in.

Twinge Chat!

...

...

That box wasn't terribly helpful.

PLEASE PICK A DIFFICULTY LEVEL

Easy

Start: GenericaSummoner: Princess Ana-Marie of Generica

Normal

Start: ElvenwoodSummoner: Yalana Moonwalker

Hard

Start: Not EviliaSummoner: E'laine M'Ango

Game Rules

Game Rules Mom has a system, you can’t interact with this system, but you CAN give suggestions.Note: by commenting below any chapter, you risk appearing in-story unless your comment specifically asks not to be included.This book's true home is on another platform. Check it out there for the real experience.ITEMSTwinge (ie: the viewers) can purchase items based on votes done on Space Battles. More instructions available there! All sales are rounded up to the nearest whole number.

Chapter One

Chapter One Anne stared at the options hovering before her. There were just three options, but somehow that was enough to give her pause. She reached out towards the menu, hand hovering over the Easy option. Easy was good, wasn’t it?

Twinge Chat!

Volkmar says: What’s this?

Jake Mania says: Mom! MOM ARE YOU OKAY?

ZAxis says: Is that someone’s mom?

FirstWinterNight25 says: Hard, cause every isekai protag can only gain power through lots of suffering!

Anne glanced at the chat interface. It said that she had seven viewers. That felt like a lot.One of the people in the chat said to press hard, and they did seem to know more about games and such than she did. She hadn’t played anything more complicated than FarmRural in a long time.Biting her lower lip, Anne reached down and tapped the Hard option.The world shivered.The hazy cocoon she was in twisted and warped. Then, with a soap-bubble pop, she was no longer in an endless void, but in a forest.Not a nice, idyllic green place, with nice trees and nice, harmless critters like squirrels and maybe a bird or two, but an ancient forest. Trees towered above her, grand and stately, their branches clawing at the sky. Dead leaves covered the ground and muffled every noise. The few bushes tough enough to survive were cruel, thorn-covered specimens, with pretty red fruit that looked tantalizingly sweet.The only critters were the few dead ones near those bushes, often with rotting berries still clamped in their innocent jaws.“Unholy Goosifer, that worked?”Anne jumped, a hand snapping to her chest as she turned. She wasn’t alone.There was... a child. A young woman, maybe in her very early teens. She was fairly short, but that might have been her frilly dress fooling the eyes. Anne eyed her up and down. Her skin was too pale, as if she hadn’t gone outside in far too long. She had strange, sharp teeth, and her eyes were reddened on the edges, with dark bags under them.She reminded Anne of her son after one of his ‘all night gaming streams’ or whatever.“Hi there,” Anne said. “I’m, ah, very lost. Do you know the way back to... Canada?” Anne glanced around the foreboding forest and felt a chill run down her spine.The young lady stood up to her full height, then curtsied, one leg crossing before the other while she pinched the sides of her skirts. “Greetings, O hero. I am Elain’e M’ango. Last daughter of the M’ango clan. You honour me by accepting my summons.”“Ah, what’s going on?” Anne asked. She still had one of the boxes open in her vision, the one with the chat on it.

Twinge Chat!

Jake Mania says: Mom! Where are you?

Jacinthec says: His poor mom

Skyblade says: cute vampire moemoe girl! Pog! (what is this game? Is this like a reenactment thing?)

Valheru says: pog

Laovi, The Eldritch Banana says: poggers

Farxzay says: pog

“What’s a pog?” Anne muttered. She shook her head and refocused. “Sorry, Miss M’ango? Ah, can you please tell me what’s going on?”The young miss rose from her curtsy, then gestured to the ground. Anne followed the gesture and noticed the circle on the forest floor around her for the first time. Ancient stones, with deep carvings inlaid within them. There were bowls dug into the rock, blasted black as if something had been burning in them just recently. “I had need for a hero. My nation needs a hero. And my clan... we are not as strong as we once were. So I petitioned to summon a hero. And here you are.”“Oh,” Anne said. She shifted from foot to foot. “Is there a way for me to get back home? I had a roast in the oven. My little Jake-i-poo’s favourite. With potatoes.”The young lady blinked. “No?” she asked. “Lady Hero, I think that only on the completion of your quest will you be able to return home.”“That doesn’t sound very nice,” Anne said. Her hands worried themselves together. She closed her eyes, then took a deep breath. “Okay.”“Okay?” Elain’e repeated.Anne nodded and stood taller.Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.She had faced worse than this!She was a single mom. And if Oprah had taught her one thing, it was that she was the toughest, meanest, most terrifying thing on Earth... or whatever planet this was. She’d do what needed doing, then be back home in time for dinner.“What do I need to do?”Miss M’ango brightened. Or she seemed to mostly brighten. Anne suspected that the young lady was in dire need of sleep. “Well, you’re a hero, so you must have some sort of special ability. That will certainly help. Ah, in the meantime... what’s your Seal cap and what’s your Mana like?”Anne blinked. “My what?”“Oh,” Elain’e said. “Well, the tomes do say that heroes often need to relearn that kind of thing. Maybe a trial by fire? We really don’t have a lot of time.”“Time for?” Anne asked.Elain’e worried on her lower lip with her long canines. “Well, you see, Lady Hero...”“Anne, my name is Anne,” Anne said.“Lady Anne,” Elain’e corrected. “You’re in the nation of Not Evilia, a minor nation, far to the north and east. We are the refuge for the unwanted here. The monstrous yet still cultured. We have promised to send out our greatest warrior to the far western lands of Doormor, to slay the dark lord rising there. But that means that every clan must present a warrior, and while my clan is old, and talented in magics, we have no such combatant.”“Wait,” Anne said. She had grown used to jumping to conclusions when talking to her son. “You want me to be that warrior?”“Yes!“Elain’e, I don’t know how to fight,” Anne said.“But... but Lady Hero, Lady Anne, the grand tournament is in three days.”Anne and Elain’e stared at each other.“This is a fighty tournament, right? Like in that one movie with Russel Crowe?” Anne asked. “It’s not a... baking tournament or anything?”Elain’e shook her head. “I’m afraid not,” she said. “Right, your status, please. It should be easy to know, if you just focus on it.”Anne glanced around herself. They were still in some great woods, far from anything. “Right, my status... um.” She scrunched her nose, and a new box appeared before her.

STATUS:SEAL: 100MANA: 100

“Um, it says that I have one hundred of both seal and mana?” Anne read. “Is this like one of those video games?”“Pardon me, but a what?”“Oh, nevermind,” Anne said.Elain’e nodded along. “Well, that’s not terrible. I took out a quest from the guild that’s in this region, as a way to test the hero if... if it actually worked.” She gestured to the side, and a card appeared in her hand. It flickered, and in a blink turned into a page covered in writing and stamped with waxy seals. “It’s nothing too complex. A small tribe of moblins that need exterminating.”“You want me to what?” Anna asked.“I’ll assist you,” Elain’e said with all the earnestness she could muster. Seeing as how she looked like she was only on the cusp of puberty, that wasn’t much.“That sounds dangerous,” Anne said.“As I said, I’ll help you. I have a full deck of magical cards. That’s my clan’s speciality! Here, I can give you a few. Maybe your heroic gift is related to these?” Elain’e flicked her hand again, and handed Anne a small stack of card.There were three of them. Two were labelled Fireball, with a large five on the left and a ten on the right. The third was labelled Cloak of Warmth. Unlike the Fireball cards, it had a silvery border.“That’s to keep you warm,” Elain’e said.“Are these pokemans?”Elain’e tilted her head to the side, a curious gesture. “No? Those are normal cards. Oh, of course. The seal cost is the number on the left, the casting cost is the one on the right. You need to spend that much to cast them. Cast the clothing first. It’s less likely to end in disaster.”Anne hesitated, then focused on the robes.The card faded out of her hands in the same instant as a long cloak appeared and immediately fell to the floor. “Oh,” she said.Elain’e knelt and picked the cloak up. “Now try sealing it. It shouldn’t be difficult for a Hero like yourself.”“What’s a sealing?” Anne asked.“It’s when you turn something into a card. Anyone can do it, and with nearly anything.”“Impressive,” Anne said. She touched the cloak, focused very very hard, and between one blink and the next, the cloak disappeared and a card appeared in Anne’s hands. “Oh, that is nifty!”“I’ll show you more about it later,” Elian’e said. “But for now, we absolutely need to get on with the training. We have very little time to prepare!”

* * *

The audience has: 103 Points!

Chapter Two

Chapter Two “Where are we going?” Anne asked.“Not too far from here,” Elain’e said. “I have a carriage waiting just outside the thickest part of the forest. But before that, we’re going to see if you have any particular gifts with regards to your summoning. The best way to do that is to put you in a situation where you need to fight. Besides, you’re not familiar with our world’s magic, it’s high time you learn.”“High time?” Anne repeated. “But Miss M’ango, I’ve only been here for, well, less than an hour.”Elain’e shrugged her little shoulders and continued to stomp ahead. Anne hadn’t realized it early, but the girl was short. Not just short because of her age, but short despite it. She only came up to Anne’s waist, and Anne wasn’t a particularly tall woman.“How old are you?” Anne asked. “Shouldn’t your parents be around here, somewhere?”“Hmm? I’m older than I look, Miss Hero. It’s generally considered taboo to ask someone of my sort their age, though of course it’s entirely forgivable seeing as how you had no way of knowing that. As for my parents, they’re long dead.”“Oh, you poor thing,” Anne said. She didn’t know how to respond to the age thing. Though, to be fair, she had been thirty-two for a couple of years once. A lady had to keep some secrets, though usually not when they were as young-seeming as Elain’e.“I’m hardly poor,” Elain’e said. “And besides, I have my great-patriarch to watch over me. He’s a powerful sorcerer, and though our clan is weaker now, he is still feared and respected in equal measure.”“That’s nice,” Anne said. A grandparent stepping in to help their grandchild? That was very sweet of them. Anne stumbled over a root, then noticed that Elain’e was keeping up the same pace and was making good time ahead of her, so she jogged after the girl while clutching onto her cloak. “So, ah, do you often venture out in the woods all on your own?”Elain’e shrugged. “While the Hard Woods are quite dangerous, I am quite capable. And you’re a hero, no less. I’m certain that none of the moblins living here will be able to harm either of us.”“Um, what’s a moblin?” Anne asked. She had so many questions. She wasn’t sure where to even begin. Really, what she needed were a few stress-free minutes to recuperate and maybe recentre herself.‘A moblin is a smaller, less intelligent sort of goblin. They’re furry creatures, clever enough to build basic huts and traps, and to equip themselves with tools, but otherwise they are a primitive pest that prey on cattle. They breed like vermin. If only two of them remain alive, then a whole colony can come to life in the space of half a year.”“That sounds awful,” Anne said. Like mice, but worse.Elain’e nodded. “Hence the extermination requests. Easy enough for anyone with an ounce of talent to take care of. I thought it was a good learning opportunity.”“But, um, I’ve only been here for an hour,” Anne said.“Well, yes, but we hardly have time to wait around, do we?” Elain’e said. “Though, we do have a little ways to go. I didn’t feel like starting a ritual right next to a moblin camp. That would have been asking for trouble.”“Why do a ritual out in these woods anyway?” Anne asked. She glanced around, and noticed for the first time that she was hunching her back under the oppressive grandeur of the woods around her.“In all honesty, Miss Hero, this ritual was a long shot. But the location I did it from is an old site where rituals were once conducted some hundred years ago. I remember quite a few grand spectacles in these woods. That was when Not Evilia was little more than a town though.”“You’re how old?” Anne asked.“As I said, it’s taboo to ask.”Anne swallowed, and continued following after the bizarre little girl.The way Elain’e talked, the way she carried herself, it was as if she had the confidence of a very self-assured adult. It clashed hard against her appearance, and Anne wasn’t sure what to do about it. Part of her wanted to protect and shelter the child-though she didn’t know how in such a strange and unfamiliar world-and another part wanted to differ to Elain’e greater knowledge and her own self-assuredness.Perhaps she could do a bit of both?She glanced to the side, where the chat still hovered, floating after her as a constant reminder that things weren’t normal. She had over a hundred viewers, if she wasn’t reading it wrong. That was impressive, wasn’t it?

Twinge Chat!

Dalewarrior says: ok whoever told the nice lady to select hard is evil and i hope they are happy

JasonFantastico says: I like the premise

ParahummintheEternalOptimist says: lol these special effects are great

Vini_kal says: I love the idea of cards as a magic system

Taverious says: : )

Logar3 says: Yo, JakeMania, are you just one of those guys, or is that actually your mum? What's going on here?

Frickin Fedora says: “Pokemans” what a boomer

Jake Mania says: Yeah, that’s my mom.

Jake Mania says: This isn’t a game, it’s a real thing. There was a portal that opened up, and she fell in

Love what you're reading? Discover and support the author on the platform they originally published on.Anne gasped. “Jake!”Elain’e stopped walking and dropped into a strange stance, an arm before her and a pair of cards appearing between her fingers, ready to be thrown while she scanned their surroundings. “What?” she hissed.“No, on this,” Anne said, gesturing to the screen. “I think that’s my little Jake-I-poo!”“Pardon me? I don’t see anything there.”Anne looked to Elain’e, then the Twinge chat hovering before her. She poked at the chat, which did nothing, her finger moving right through it. “You can’t see this box?”Elain’e shook her head. “What’s in it? Can you describe the phenomena?”“It’s a chat box. Like, oh you probably don’t have Facebook here. That’s probably for the best. Ah, it’s a thing where people can talk. It says that different people said different things. They’re all talking to each other, and I can see it.”“Interesting,” Elain’e said. “What are they talking about?”“What I’m doing here, I think,” Anne said. “But I don’t know what a pog is.”Elain’e’s eyes narrowed. “Likely some sort of curse,” she muttered. “You’re saying that they can see what you do?”“I don’t know? They’re talking about things going on here though. I think this is like in some of Jake’s games.”“That might be your unique power,” Elain’e said. “We will have to investigate it further later on.” She pointed ahead. “The moblin camp is just over that rise. We can’t afford to make too much noise, nor be distracted while playing with strange new magics.”“Yes, but I think that one of the people in the chat is my son.”“You have a son?” Elain’e asked.Anne nodded. “Oh yes. He’s a very sweet boy. He just has a few little problems, but he’s very nice. Sometimes I wish he’d listen to me some more, he could accomplish so much if he just tried a little harder.”“Uh, right,” Elain’e said. “Wel, we can explore that later. Come, see that hill there?”Anne followed the direction of Elain’e’s pointing finger and found a hill not too far from where they stood. It was a small rise in the otherwise relatively flat terrain of the forest. There seemed to be a dip in the landscape though, all except for the one hill that rose where the rest fell.“The camp’s on the other side of that,” Elain’e said. “We’ll hit them from above. Do you have your Fireball cards?”Anne nodded, then paused. “Um, no? I swear I had them in hand.” She started patting herself down, but of course her skirts had no pockets.“You must have sealed them by accident,” Elain’e said. “Probably for the best. Cards can cast themselves if left unsealed for too long. You don’t want a Fireball going off in your petticoats. Check your Status amount.”

STATUS:SEAL: 90 / 100MANA: 100

“Oh, my Seal is down by ten.”“That sounds right for two Fireballs,” Elain’e said. “I’ll show you how to unseal them in a moment, but first...” she girl knelt down and picked up a rock from the ground. She frowned for just a moment before the rock turned into a card.Anne took the card when it was handed to her. It read as a rock, with a one in each upper corner.When you unseal a spell, it travels in the direction the card was moving in. Throw that card while unsealing it.”Anne did so.The card immediately flipped around in mid-air as soon as it was out of her grasp, then fell to the floor.“Right,” Elain’e said. “Timing is tricky. Ah, for moving spells like Fireball, just aiming the card in the direction you want and casting it while moving your arm should be enough.” She demonstrated the smooth motion with one hand, sliding it forwards and snapping her fingers midway through the motion. “Come on, let’s find a nice quiet spot to hit the camp from. There’s no better practice than in the field, or so my great-patriarch says.”Anne had a worrying feeling in the pit of her stomach that things weren’t quite as easy as Elain’e was saying.

* * *

The audience has: 137 Points!

Chapter Three

Chapter Three Anne shifted, the leaves underfoot rustling just a little bit. It was a slight sound, one that she’d been making the entire time they were walking through the forest, but it was only now that she was trying to be quiet, to be sneaky, that she realized just how noisy it could be.Elain’e shot her a look, clearly telling her, without words, to be quiet.She shrugged a little. Her entire sneaking experience was regulated to a few little trysts back in highschool (which was a long time ago) and when she slid into Jake’s room at night to make sure he was sleeping comfortably. She wasn’t exactly a ninja.“There they are,” Elain’e said. She gestured just a little ways ahead of them. They were near the very top of that hill Elain’e had pointed out earlier. It ended on a steep drop, a tree on the edge of it leaning over somewhat precariously, but its huge roots kept it firmly locked in place.Below, the land swept down to the bottom of a slight crevice where a gurgling brook cut around exposed boulders and mossy rocks. A camp was settled in under the hillside, where there were fewer trees.Anne counted six tents. Not the nice sort of tent some people used for camping, but simple cloth held up by sticks and tied to the nearest trees for support. There was more luck in the designs than actual skill.Between those tents, milling about and sniffing at the air, or even just sleeping on warm-looking rocks, were the moblins.They looked, to Anne, like a strange and unnerving cross between a human child, a raccoon, and a feral cat. They were covered in fur, sometimes short, sometimes long, and always matted and dirty, with long snouts and pronounced canines.They had hands, though they seemed clumsy about making stuff. One of them was striking a stick with a rock, sharpening the stick, but it kept hitting the stick at an off angle and undoing its own work.“I count nine,” Elain’e said. “That’s three more than the reports said. Either the scout that passed by was incompetent, or the band grew larger.”“That’s a lot,” Anne said. She worried at the edge of the cloak Elain’e had given her.“It’s only a small band,” Elain’e said. “Come on, spell cards out. We have a great vantage to hit the moblins from.”“Elain’e,” Anne said. “I don’t know if I can do this.”Elain’e paused. “Don’t worry, the spells I gave you barely cost any mana, and they’re simple to cast. Even if you miss the first few, I’m sure you’ll catch onto the trick of them. A child could do it.”“No, Elain’e, I meant that I’m not sure if I can kill those. They look like people. Like... stray cats maybe?”“They’re hardly stray cats,” Elain’e said. “Moblins are a pest. They breed uncontrollably fast, and when they grow hungry enough, they start roaming around, looking for anything that’s edible. They’ll raid small villages, ambush caravans, and kidnap children to eat them. They’re a pest.”Anne chewed on her lip. She had never shied away from setting mouse traps and such before. Was this the same?Elain’e flicked her hand to the side, and a card appeared in it. Anne recognized the art on the front of it. A fireball, same as the two she had. “Just like this,” she said.She girl flung her hand towards the camp below, and in a flash the card she held turned into a glowing ball of fire that roared down into the clearing and smashed into the moblin that was sharpening a stick.The creature didn’t even scream before it was dead.Anne slapped her hands over her mouth.“Come on, lady hero,” Elain’e said. “Your turn.”Anne shook her head. “I can’t do that, Elain’e, it’s awful.”The moblins below screamed and started to run around, picking up sharp rocks and club-like sticks as they moved in a panicked frenzy. One of them sniffed the air, then pointed up the hill to where Anne and Elain’e were waiting.“Miss Hero... Anne. We need you to be able to defend yourself. Look, they’re coming up the hill, they’re practically lined up for you to kill them all.”Anne looked at the child before her, somewhat horrified by her casual use of violence. Still, Elain’e was right, ther moblins were coming up the hill, and they seemed quite angry about the whole situation.She glanced at her chat for help, a last resort.

Twinge Chat!

Jake Mania says: Mom, either get out of there or fight

Phantomxz says: fluffy goblins!

Pillows182 says: poggers!

Dalewarrior says: if the nice lady dies because someone decided to meme we are going to have problems

Xxcoder says: fireball them

Jake Mania says: Mom! Please!

Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original.Her Jake was replying, telling her to fight. Anne took a deep breath and unsealed the two Fireball cards she had. “Okay,” she said. “How do I use these?”“Like I said, just cast one while pushing you hand in the direction you want to fire them in,” Elain’e said. She was entirely calm as the moblins started to race up the hill and a flung rock sailed overhead.Anne’s hands shook a little, but she had been brave before, and she could be brave again. She stook, a card held tight in her hand. Pulling her arm back, she flung it forwards, as if throwing a ball, then cast the spell.The fireball appeared just ahead of her hand, an uncomfortable warmth washing over then rushing away too quickly to burn. The spell screamed through the air and smashed into a tree behind the moblins.“Not too bad,” Elain’e said. “Try aiming a little bit ahead this time. Fireballs need time to travel. It’s mostly a question of practice.”Anne sniffed, grabbed the next card, then flung it the same way. This time, it crashed into the ground ahead of the moblins, kicking up dirt and pebbles.“I’m out,” Anne said.“Oh, that’s not a problem.” Elain’e said. She gestured and a small stack appeared in her hands.The girl split the stack and gave five to Anne. “Thank you,” Anne said. She quickly turned back to the moblins rushing up the hill and fired off another Fireball.Her third time was the charm, and at long last, it passed close enough to one of the screaming little creatures that the fire lit up their fur and they started to panic. That panic lead to them tripping, and rolling back down the steep incline, aflame the whole while.“Oh, oh no,” Anne said, tears in her eyes. But she had to continue. Jake was watching, and she couldn’t allow him to see his mother dying.She flung the next Fireball, then the next. Soon she was panting, she was out of cards, and there were two more dead moblins as well as a few patches on some trees that were blackened.“Not bad,” Elain’e said.Anne swallowed. “I’m out of cards,” she said.“No worries, I’m sure... huh?”Anne blinked as a card appeared before her out of thin air, then started to fall down. Elain’e swiped it out of the air with cat-like reflexes. “What is it?’ Anne asked.“It’s... a book? The System’s Guide to Magic for Dummies. Low cost, low rarity. Where did this come from?”“I don’t know,” Anne said. She stared as a second card appeared out of the air, and this time she was fast enough to catch it on her own.She stared.The image on the cart was of an orchard, with a nice cart sitting next to a tree, filled with red and orange mangos. The card was called Cart of Mangos.“What?” Anne muttered.“Well, that’s strange,” Elain’e said. She flicked her hand and another card appeared for just a moment before she cast the spell on it. With a crack, a dozen cutting electrical bolts jerked through the air and smashed into the remaining moblins. Elain’e wasn’t even watching. “What’s that card?”“It’s Cart of Mangos,” Anne said.“... what?”

Twinge Chat!

Taverius says: :0

Gabriel minoru says: Fireball Elain’e!

DeviousFerret says: Did you see the item shop?

CombatWombat says: Just got here, what’s going on?

He who travels the stories says: Someone’s mom got isekai’d. It’s an ARC

Alpharue says: I simp for Jake’s mom. I’mma buy some mangos!

Corvidsword says: oh, finally, a sensible purchase!

Valheru says: Pog!

“Oh,” Anne said. She had to scroll up to find the first mention of mangos. The rest was a lot of mocking her for her aim, or saying that the CGI wasn’t very good.“Oh?” Elain’e repeated. She wasn’t looking at Anne though, she was looking at the card in Anne’s hand while licking her lips. The very image of a young girl staring at a bowlful of candy.“Some nice boy on my chat, ah, bought the mangos for me.”Elain’e looked up. “Wait, what?”“I think that’s how it works?” Anne said. “I don’t know.”“But... why?”“Well, this is the internet, I’m sure they have a very good reason for it.”

* * *

The audience has: 159 Points!

Chapter Four

Chapter Four “Are you... well?” Elain’e asked.Anne glanced around, at the destroyed camp, and at the few bodies she could see laying in the dirt and grime. It took her a long moment to build up the courage to speak. “I think I’m alright,” she said.“I’m sorry,” Elain’e said. She was looking at Anne, her thumb idly running up and down the surface of the card in her hand. “I shouldn’t have pushed you quite that hard quite so soon. I... didn’t consider the kind of person that might come from the summoning.”Part of Anne wanted to be angry. This much violence, it was wrong. But a glance at Elain’e, and at the remorse in her eyes barely concealed by the pouty glare she wore, and Anne decided to forgive the girl. “Should we go, ah, somewhere else? Do you live near here?”“I have a carriage,” Elain’e said. “It can lead us to Castle M’ango.”“You have a castle?” Anne asked.“The clan does. Though really, it’s just my grand-patriarch and myself that live there on most days. There’s staff too, of course.”“Does anyone... take care of you?” Anne asked.Elain’e frowned. “I don’t need that kind of help,” she said.Anne nodded. She could vividly remember Jake’s own teenage years when he said something much the same to her. Of course, he also expected her to still make him breakfast and dinner at the time.Elain’e started walking with sure steps away from the corpses she had made. “Your power seems to be interesting,” she said while waving the book card around. “This has potential. A lot of potential, even.”“That’s nice,” Anne said. It really was. She didn’t know why she was here exactly. It felt surreal. One moment she was at home, checking in on Jake while the roast— “Oh no!”Elain’e flinched. “What is it?” she asked.“The roast!”“The what?”Anne clasped her hands over her mouth and then stared at the chat. Jake’s name hadn’t come up in a while. “Jake! Jake, sweetie, are you there?”

Twinge Chat!

CallMeCat says: Go momtagonist!

SirSheepish says: I’m a little sad she had to kill some goblins...

Gabriel Minoru says: The shop doesn’t make sense. It’s just a text bar and then it gives you a price?

Gknight says: Shop doesn’t work?

Maxibon says: lmao

Alpharue says: pog!

Jake Mania says: Yeah mom, I’m here

GanguroGal says: Say “Ara ara!”

“Okay, Jake, listen to me. The roast is in the oven. There’s a timer, the little red one. When it rings, you need to open the oven and pour the marinade on the meat, and a bit on the carrots and potatoes too, then you put it back in for another half hour. Okay?”“Who are you talking to?” Elain’e asked.“I... look, when I came here, I left some food in the oven. And my son, he’s one of the people in this little chat box things. I’ve seen him watching shows and things before. He gets distracted easily. I just want him to make sure the roast doesn’t burn.”“If you say so,” Elain’e said. “Do you think you can ask for more things? More specific things, perhaps?” She wiggled the card around.“I don’t know, sweetie, I don’t want to rely on charity, especially if those people are spending their own money on these things.”Elain’e shrugged. “It could be useful. So far we have a book in a card that I haven’t unsealed yet, and a cart of mangoes.” She licked her lips again. “Which are a delicacy. And quite valuable.”“Oh, I know. They’re so hard to buy though. I can never tell when they’re ripe or not.”Anne chatted about groceries, a subject she really could go on about for hours. Elain’e interjected at times, but Anne figured she was too young to be doing that kind of shopping all on her own, and Anne knew that she was really just talking to work off some of the nervous energy rolling around in the pit of her stomach.They were a good ways into the forest when a card appeared right in front of Anne. She caught it, then stared at it while still walking. “This is strange,” she said. The card was a flat grey, with flecks of decorative rust on its edges. Its image depicted a scarred and crater-covered mountain. The text read ‘A Damaged Mountain.’ Its seal cost was in the millions, the numbers barely fitting on the card, but the cast cost was low.This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.“May I see that?” Elain’e asked.Anne passed the card over, then gasped as the girl nearly tripped over nothing.“An entire mountain?!” Elain’e said. She held the card close to her face. “This is insane!”“Um,” Anne said.“You don’t understand, sorry. This is a mountain.”“Yes,” Anne said. “The art on the card is very nice?”“No, Anne, this is a mountain.” Elain’e waved the card about. “A whole mountain. You can’t just have a whole mountain appear out of thin air! We’d die. Not Evilia would be crushed from here. The earthquake alone would kill thousands!”“Oh,” Anne said. “Can’t you just, tear the card apart?”“That would make the mountain appear too, but worse,” Elain’e said. “We need to find a way to get rid of this. All cards will eventually summon themselves. Magical ones and living things in cards will unseal the fastest, but we basically only have a few hours to work with here.”“What do we do?” Anne asked.“We pick up the pace,” Elain’e said. “We can... tie the card to a flying creature, send it out over the ocean, maybe.”“I feel like that’s also a bad idea,” Anne said. She didn’t know much about geography, but she wasn’t entirely ignorant of the possible impacts a mountain appearing over the ocean could have. “Oh, what do we do?”A card appeared before her, and she gasped as she picked it out of the air.‘Worn-Out Army of Jake Maia,’ read the card. There was an image below that, of an army in tatters, an army of teenaged boys that seemed very, very familiar, though she wasn’t used to seeing her son in thick padded armour and carrying shields and spears.“Can that help?” Elain’e asked.Anne shook her head. “I don’t think so,” she said.It hurt her to say it, but Jake really wouldn’t know what to do here. He was a sweet boy, but not a very useful one.“Damnation of all the gods,” Elain’e swore.Another card appeared, the third in as many minutes. “Oh!” Anne said as she looked on the cover. “This one... might?”The image was of a young asian girl, in an outfit like in those shows her son watched, but her legs looked like sci-fi thrusters, and she was flying. ‘Non-Magical, Highly Mobile, Heavily Armed and Armored Killbot,’ was the name of the card. It barely fit at the top.“It costs more to cast than I can,” Anne said. Nearly a thousand points of mana to cast.Elain’e looked at it, stared in confusion at the image, then nodded. “I can cast it,” she said. “Give me just a moment, and pray that we don’t end this entire nation by burying it under stone.”Anne nodded, shifting from foot to foot while Elain’e summoned more and more cards. She cast a few, releasing that she had an entire desk sealed away, as well as some large, glowing stones and a few strange brass devices. She placed the robot card down, touched a few devices to it, then nodded to herself. “This should help with the casting,” she said. “It’s a bit beyond me without something to assist.”“That’s fine, you're doing your best,” Anne said.Elain’e cheeks turned the faintest shade of red for a moment under the praise. “Yes, well, death by crushing is an excellent motivator. Now one moment.”The girl closed her eyes, then glared. The card she was touching disappeared with a burst of smoke, and, from out of thin air, a young girl appeared. She was a head taller than Elain’e, and much older, maybe in her late teens. She might have been a young-looking twenty year old, even.“Greetings,” a purely robotic voice came from her lips. “I am Newtonian Electronic War Terminator. Please say ‘Newt on’ to activate me.’”Anne glanced at Elain’e, who shrugged back. “I have never seen anything quite like that before,” she said as she idly turned the things on her desk back into cards that disappeared without much fanfare.Anne, having nothing to lose, cleared her throat. “Newt on,” she said.The robot-girl opened her eyes. “Greetings, General. I am ready to serve.”“Oh, I’m hardly a general,” Anne said. “I don’t have any titles, nothing beyond mom.”“Correction, greetings, mom.”“Ah, well, yes,” Anne said. She shifted her weight, then raised the mountain card up. “Can you get rid of this?”The girl’s arms split open, revealing large canons hidden within. “Target acquired.”“No, no, I mean. Put it somewhere far away.”“The ocean,” Elain’e said.“I was thinking more... Can you get to space?” Anne asked.

* * *

The audience has: 116 Points!

Chapter Five

Chapter Five Anne watched as the little blip that was Newt disappeared into a cloud, far, far above.“That was a missed opportunity,” Elain’e said. “Though I suppose it might be for the best.”“Missed opportunity?” Anne repeated. She looked back down, then rubbed at the back of her neck to work out a kink there.“Dropping a mountain on an enemy of Not Evilia might have made the clan very popular.”“That could have killed... lots of people,” Anne said. In reality, she had a hard time wrapping her head around it all. A whole mountain in a card? Something so small that she could hold it pinched between two fingers?“You’re right, we hardly had time to think through all of the political ramifications of it. And besides, the nearest truly enemy nation is far to the west. The card might unseal before reaching them.”“Enemy?” Anne asked.“Ah, yes. I suppose I ought to give you the lay of the land. Even a hero needs to know who is their adversary and who isn’t.” Elain’e gestured ahead. “Come!”Anne picked up her skirts and jogged to catch up Elain’e, who seemed to be walking with as much speed as she could manage while still remaining somewhat dignified. That meant that she was flouncing more than she was walking, and Anne thought it was very cute, but she knew that telling that to someone could really ruin their mood, especially if they were trying to be taken seriously.At least, that was how Jake reacted to her telling him he was cute and hugging him in front of his little friends.“Ah, right here,” Elain’e said. Anne moved around a particularly large tree, then paused as she found herself standing next to a road. It wasn’t a nice asphalt road like back home, but a path made of stamped dirt, two tracks marking where carriages and carts had pressed down the earth countless times. “This way,” Elain’e said.Anne caught up with her, running made much easier now that she didn’t need to worry about bushes and such. “You said you had a, ah, carriage?” Anne asked.“Just around the bend here,” Elain’e said.“Is that where your guardians are?”“Guardians? No, I came on my own,” Elain’e said. She sniffed. “I’m hardly a child, despite my appearances.”“Of course not,” Anne said without meaning it.They rounded a slight bend in the road, and Anne slowed to a stop. There was a grassy area next to the road where a carriage was parked. It seemed, to Anne’s inexpert eye, like a very nice carriage. All black wood, glossy and clean, with silver gilding and a shield carefully painted on the doors. There were four horses ahead of the carriage.Those were what gave Anne pause.“Are those skeletons?” Anne asked.Elain’e half-turned, then followed Anne’s gaze to the horses. “They’re skeletal horses. Perhaps not as strong as a flesh and blood horse, and not nearly as keen, but they’re obedient and they don’t need nearly as much maintenance.” She walked over to the carriage door, then hopped up, trying to reach the handle.Anne walked over and opened the door for her. “Okay,” she said. She decided not to stare at the roughly horse-shaped piles of bone. Elain’e climbed in, and Anne pulled herself up and into the carriage a moment after.She sat down across from Elain’e while staring around the interior. She had expected a carriage like in those period dramas she enjoyed so much. Instead, the inside only had two small seats in the middle, and there were shelves built into the walls. A lamp hung from the ceiling, creaking as the carriage settled after they found their seats. “I keep a small library here,” Elain’e explained somewhat bashfully. “Just in case.”“That’s fine,” Anne said. “My little Jake liked reading a lot when he was younger. It’s a good habit to have.”“Yes, certainly,” Elain’e agreed while smoothing down her skirts. “Now... where were we. Ah yes, a mountain card was summoned from thin air with the ability to kill both of us. As well as a card with what I suspect is an advanced automaton and... may I see the other cards?”Anne still had the other cards in hand. She gave them to Elain’e in a hurry. “Here you go.”“And army of worn-out Jake Maias?” Elain’e asked.“That’s my Jake. My son, I mean. It’s him in the image too.”“Strange,” Elain’e asked. “And this... a book, I think. The System’s Guide to Magic for Dummies.” Elain’e twisted her wrist, and the card turned into a book. It was bright orange, and seemed to have been battered a little. Some pages were obviously dog-eared as well.Unauthorized content usage: if you discover this narrative on Amazon, report the violation.The girl leafed through the pages in a hurry, stopping to stare at some diagrams and images along the way. It looked to Anne like a mass-market paperback kind of book.“As I said, strange, and rather useless. This is an overly simplified guide to magic and how to use cards. A child ought to know everything in this.” She tilted her head at one particularly messy diagram. “Though perhaps it has some unique insights?”“Maybe it’s to help me?” Anne asked.“That’s possible,” Elain’e said. She set the book onto a little table next to her plush seat (with cushions so that she wasn’t sinking too deep into it and could still reach said table). She pulled out the last card, the cart of mangos. “This one is... likely precious. We should open it at the castle. But... I don’t see the link between all of these. The mountain, the automaton, the book.”Anne didn’t miss the way Elain’e clutched the Cart of Mangoes card. “Well, I think that there are people, ah, watching me, and they might be the ones buying these things, maybe?”Elain’e squinted at Anne. “That’s very bizarre. Usually heroes grow faster, or have access to unique magics. This... is very different from anything like that.”“I didn’t exactly ask for that,” Anne said.The girl nodded. “You’re right, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t be measuring things based on my own expectations. It’s unreasonable.”“You’re very mature,” Anne praised.Elain’e lips pinched in a tiny pout even as her cheeks warmed from deathly pale to rather-ordinary pale. “Yes, well, I’ve had time to mature.” She leaned to the side, and tugged on a little cord. A bell tolled just outside the carriage. “To tell the horses to bring us back home. I suspect your automata will be able to find you, don’t worry.”“Um, alright,” Anne said. She sat back with her hands on her lap and waited while Elain’e stared at the book she’d bought and toyed with the Cart of Mangoes card.It was the first time Anne really had to think, and she wished she didn’t have the time for it.So, instead, she glanced at her chat.

Twinge Chat!

FestinFamilial says: This can’t be CGI?

CallMeCat says: Robogirl off to make a new planet!

Mercredi says: How are they making things people buy appear?

Idram says: Magic!

SousMarines says: the set design is pog

Smuggles999 says: I want to give her another mountain now

Valheru says: I'm for the plan "drop the mountain on the demon lord"

Dalewarrior says: HOW AND WHY DID WE BUY A MOUNTAIN

He who Travels the stories says: From which height? That could easily become a "dinosaur extinction" level event. With momtagonist still on the planet.

Jake Mania says: Hang in there mom. I love you. You’ll be okay. We’ll help.

Chicken Wings says: Neeerd

Jake Mania says: the roast was good

Anne touched the text her son had written to her. And to think that all it took for him to open up a little was for her to be portalled into a strange world with monsters and magic and strange little girls.She sighed as the carriage started to rattle and bump along the road, trees scrolling past the windows. “Elain’e. Why did you summon me again? You said something about a tournament?”“Yes, one for the honour of my clan, and one to find a warrior worthy of leaving Not Evilia and fighting against the Dark Lord’s hoards.”“Leaving Not Evilia?” Anne asked.“Is something easier said than done. Not Evilia was founded several hundred years ago as a palace where the... not-quite-human could gather and feel safe, where we could depend on each other. It was a nice idea that took a lot of work to realize, and even now it’s far from perfect. Part of what keeps the nations safe also makes travel prohibitively difficult though.”“Oh,” Anne said. She wasn’t quite sure she understood, but she thought it might start making sense eventually.At least, she hoped it would all start making sense soon.The alternative was entirely too distasteful to think about.

* * *

The audience has: 159 Points!

Chapter Six

Chapter Six “There it is,” Elain’e said as she leaned to the side. She was peeking out between the curtains of the carriage while squinting against the bright noon-day sun.There hadn’t been that much light available in the forest, not with towering trees all around casting shade across the entire ground. But their route wasn’t confined to the forest. They had been moving gently upwards for a while, and Anne had delighted in looking out the window as they rose high enough to see the forest spread out all the way to the other side of a wide valley where more mountains rose.Anne could see a city in the distance too. Elain’e had called it Not Evilia, the capital of the nation going by the same name. It looked grand, even from so far away, with towers and castles and great big walls circling around it.“There’s what?” Anne asked. She leaned forwards and peeked out of the same window that Elain’e was looking from.There was a castle ahead. Not a big mansion, but an actual castle, with tall walls covered in arrowslits, and two large towers on either end of the building. There were walls around the castle as well. Not as impressive as the castle’s own walls, but still quite grand and made of a dark stone covered in climbing ivy.The tiny figures of men moved along the walls, patrolling them in neat formations while others stood still near the gates.“Is that your home?” Anne asked.“That’s castle M’ango,” Elain’e confirmed. “The clan’s last and first estate. There are just two of us living there now.”“I see guards,” Anne said.“Oh, those are contracted undead. Technically they’re not living at all. Though I suppose they have a breakroom.”Anne looked between Elain’e, then the castle again. It soon disappeared out of sight as they circled around a tight curve. The entire path up to the castle was made of switch-back roads with a slight slope to them.When they reached the top of the hill, the road straightened, allowing them to ride right up to the gate just as it started to open. “Time to gather our things,” Elain’e said. She touched a few items in the carriage and turned them into cards which she whisked away. Anne didn’t have nearly as much to do, so she fidgeted with her skirt and tried not to appear too nervous.The carriage stopped, and Elain’e, being a lot younger and more spry than Anne felt, jumped out of her seat, grabbed a large-brimmed hat from the back of her seat, and hopped out of the carriage.Anne followed a little more carefully. She cupped a hand over her brow and looked around at the courtyard. There were great big bushes and a few little flower patches along the gravel roadway that filled up the middle of the yard. Someone had gone through some effort to dress up the blocky stone building so that it didn’t seem quite so drab.Elain’e fixed her hat on. “Come on, I don’t know if we have time for a grand tour, but I can at the very least show you around a little.”“It’s a very nice place,” Anne said, falling on old pleasantries for lack of better things to say. “Very... medieval.” The homes in her magazines were usually significantly less rustic.She stared at the pair of skeletons who opened the front doors of the castle for them, and at the shambling ghouls who stumbled over to the carriage and led it towards some stables.“Is everyone here... dead?” Anne asked.“Of course. Necromancy isn’t forbidden in Not Evilia. I think it’s part of what makes us quite unpopular among the other nations of the world.”They entered a grand lobby room, with a fireplace at one end with lounge chairs near it, and a small area with wardrobes and hat racks. Elain’e tossed her hat onto one of those before moving on to the back of the room where a staircase led up a floor.“Where are we going?” Anne asked as she rubbed her feet against the rub near the door. She would have taken off her shoes, but Elain’e hadn’t, and they didn’t have a basket of slippers near the door.Really, the entire place was lacking a woman’s touch, in Anne’s opinion.“My office,” Elain’e said. “Just up the stairs here.”Anne followed Elain’e, up the stairs and into a large office. The walls were covered in bookshelves and a huge wooden desk dominated the centre of the room, covered in papers and even more books.A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.“Forgive the mess,” Elain’e said. “I... didn’t actually consider cleaning up in here, and I generally forbid the staff from entering.” She looked a bit bashful, especially when Anne touched a shelf and ran a finger across the edge, coming back with a nice thick coating of dust.“Well, I’m sure we can clean this up in no time flat,” Anne said encouragingly.“We hardly have the time for that,” Elain’e said. She gestured to the far wall, where a second desk sat under a great big map.

“Oh,” Anne said.“If we’re going to succeed, then you need to know the political terrain.” Elain’e summoned a card, then cast it to reveal a long wooden rod, a very thin and whippy one that she used to touch the map on the upper-right corner. “That’s where we are now.”“Not Evilia,” Anne read. “It seems pretty far from everything.”“That it is. The area is rather cold, and there are lots of roaming monsters in the regions around here. It’s why the area was chosen for the founding of the nation. It’s quiet.”“Why were you looking for something quiet?” Anne asked.“Because the people that live here are monsters, Anne. At least as far as many of the people from other nations are concerned. The humans are a mixed bag, but the elves generally despise us on principle, the dragon-kin think we’re food, and the witches consider us fresh ingredients. We carved out a place where we could be safe.”“Oh,” Anne said. She leaned closer to the map. “Elves and dragons. This really is a fantasy world.”“I... suppose it is rather fantastic?” Elain’e said. “Our main objective now is to win the tournament. You have what might be a huge advantage, Anne. We can enter you as a caster, maybe, or as a summoner. I think that would pass without too much fuss. As long as you win decisively, then it’s a non-issue.”“I’m really not sure about that tournament thing,” Anne said.“Don’t worry, I’ll explain it all tomorrow,” Elain’e said. Anne had the impression that she had just missed Anne’s point entirely.“Why do you want to win this tournament so much?” Anne asked.Elain’e froze, then smiled at Anne. It was the sort of smile that had all the alarms going off in Anne’s head. Not a dangerous smile, but one of a child lying to make their parent feel better. “I just want to do right by my clan.”“That’s all?” Anne asked.“Why would I need any other reason to want to win?” Elain’e asked. She crossed her arms, cheeks puffing out in the slightest of pouts.“You know, Elain’e, if we’re going to work together, and you seem like a very nice girl to work with, then there’s no harm in telling me what’s really going on.”“I didn’t lie,” Elain’e said.“But did you tell the whole truth?” Anne asked.They stared at each other for a moment before Elain’e looked away. “Fine,” she muttered. “I want to leave Not Evilia. It’s not the nation itself. I like it here. We’re a powerful clan, and I’m respected enough, I guess. But... I’m not from here. My family used to live in a nice little town between Generica and the Drylands. We had to flee, because of reasons, but... but we couldn’t all leave.”“Oh,” Anne said.“Maybe some of them are still there, even after all this time. The barrier makes it so that even now that I’m much stronger, I can’t return to see. Not unless an opportunity shows up. This might be the first and last one in a long time.”Anne swept forwards, then paused just before Elain’e. “I’m going to hug you now, okay?” she asked.“Huh?” Elain’e said.That was enough of a yes for Anne. She grabbed the girl and pressed her close. “You poor thing. No one should be separated from their family like that.”“‘M fine,” Elain’e muttered into Anne’s chest.“Shh, shh, it’s okay. I know you must have worked very hard to see your family again. And... for what it’s worth, I forgive you for calling me over here. So, how about we work hard to win that little tournament of yours and find your family, what do you say?”

* * *

The audience has: 183 Points!

Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven “Um,” Anne said.She stared at the food sitting on the plate that Elain’e had set before her. There was a potato. It was steaming and warm. Next to that was a carrot, also warm-looking, and a cup of water.Elain’e winced. “That’s not exactly a heroic meal, is it?” she asked.“Is this what you eat normally?” Anne asked.“Hmm? Oh, no,” Elain’e said. “No, no, my Grand-Patriarch and I have our own, uh, special diet.” She raised her hands, almost in surrender. “Don’t worry, you don’t need to partake in that. Or be partaken of.”“Oh...kay,” Anne said. She looked around the richly appointed rooms that Elain’e had shown her to. The decor was a little drab, with darker colours being more common than not, but the room still felt luxurious. The bed was a huge four-poster, off in a smaller room to the side and she had her own washroom and powder room as well as a living space with a few books and some bright lanterns hanging from the ceiling.She took in the richness of the room, then stared at the plate Elain’e had brought, with its lonesome potato and sad little carrot. There was a serious and obvious mis-match in quality.“Elain’e, sweetie. While eating your veggies is wonderful, this... isn’t very healthy in the long run.”“No no, we... Lady Hero, Anne. You do know what I am, don’t you?” Elain’e asked.“A very nice young lady?” Anne tried.Elain’e stared at her. “I thought you knew. The pale skin, the gaunt features, my eternal youth... or perhaps I’ve made a great mistake and there are none like us where you’re from?”“There are lots of smart young ladies where I’m from,” Anne said.“I’m a vampire,” Elain’e said.Anne stared. “Well... yes, now that you mention it, all the signs are there. Though, I’m not sure if I actually believe it. Um, not that I’d accuse you of lying or anything,” Anne said. She gnawed at her lower lip, then clapped her hands. “That’s it. There has to be a kitchen here?”“We have a kitchen, yes,” Elain’e said.“Then we’re going to do some baking.”“Baking?” Elain’e asked.Anne nodded. “Yes. Baking. I don’t think I’ve needed some cookies this badly since. Oh, since Jake was still in my tummy. Come on, it’s nothing too complicated.”Anne stepped out of her rooms, and Elain’e followed after her, even when she started to walk down the corridor only for Elain’e to helpfully point out that the kitchens were in the other direction.The interior of the castle wasn’t entirely free of decorations. There were shields on racks on the walls, with swords hooked behind them, and there was a well-worn rug running down the centre of the corridors they took towards the kitchens.Anne followed after Elain’e but she split her attention to stare at her chat. The chat was getting more and more active, even though she wasn’t doing anything interesting. There were people repeating the same things, and sometimes asking her questions.She was... a little reluctant to answer them, but maybe if they asked something appropriate she might reply. So far a lot of the questions had been downright rude.

Twinge Chat!

Forrest Andar says: Did they put the astroid in space?

MultipleChoice says: I’m looking forward to the possibility of an astroid base

Gabriel minoru says: lmao

He Who Travels the Stories says: To the tournament: For honor! For glory! For the obligatory tournament arc!

Qmills88 says: To the tournament: For honor! For glory! For the obligatory tournament arc!

Xxcoder says: Bring back the bot!

Branding says: Why did a mom get isekai’d?

SkippyRebo says: Anne seems overwhelmed.

CorrectedHorse says: Skill hug has upgraded!

Hoduka Dakokty says: Pog

Phantomxz says: Hey what kind of food do you like?

Grimjawfury says: Where’s the robot girl?

A case of theft: this story is not rightfully on Amazon; if you spot it, report the violation.Anne fixated on the one question she could answer. “The kinds of foods I like?” she asked aloud.The chat immediately devolved into a bunch of people reacting to... her reaction, essentially. It was a little strange to have so many people paying attention to her. There were nearly a hundred of them!“Are you talking to the... chat thing?” Elain’e asked.“I am,” Anne said. “They asked me what sort of foods I like. Um. I like mostly simple, nice things. Roasts, with some healthy greens. It’s easy to make. Oh, and I make a mean shepherd's pie, and my double chocolate chip cookies have been very, very popular at every local bake sale, you know?”“If you say so,” Elain’e said.Anne reached over and ruffled the girl’s hair. Her head pressed up against the contact for a moment before Elain’e flinched and turned her head away.“That was inappropriate, Miss Anne. I’m a lady of the court, not your daughter.”“Oh, I’m sorry,” Anne said. “I won’t do it again.”Elain’e crossed her arms. “It’s fine. You’re forgiven.”The kitchens, as it turned out, were quite expansive, and quite empty. They were well-maintained, but it was clear from from a sniff that nothing more complicated than a baked potato had been made there in some time.“Oh, I do hope there are ingredients around.”“I think we keep the pantry stocked. It isn’t common, but on occasion we will have a guest from one of the other clans ruling over Not Evilia. We will often hire some cooks and order additional provisions if they will stay for an extended period, otherwise, we keep the pantry filled with necessities.”Anne found a box that let out cool air when she opened it. There were some glass bottles of milk within, next to even more gladd bottles filled with some reddish liquid she didn’t touch. “Oh, and this must be the flour... yes. Now, where are the eggs?”“I think they’re here,” Elain’e said as she opened a cupboard.“Well done!” Anne said. “You can be my sous-chef!”“Um... well, I suppose it will be like alchemy practice.”“That’s the spirit,” Anne said. “Baking is its own sort of magic, you know?”“If you say so.”Anne set everything out on one of the long counters in the middle of the room. For all that it was rather rustic, the kitchen had a nice floorplan. She was quite envious of that. “Right, we need to get that oven preheated... somehow. I’ve never worked with a wood oven before, so it will be a bit touch and go. Then we need... ah, that’s where the bowls are. Yes, this will work out just fine. Now, if only I had an apron.”“I there there are some over-” Elain’e began. She stopped when a card appeared before Anne who caught it out of the air and stared at it.“The Apron of M.I.L.F.,” she read. The card had a diamond-like border, and was much nicer than any of those she had handled so far. The image was of a very nice apron, held over the empty as as if the invisible person wearing it was caught mid-twirl, and smaller text below the name spelled out its title. Multiple Independent Life-preserving Functions. “Oh! Thank you boys, that’s very nice of you,” she said to the chat.“May I see that?” Elain’e asked. She was on tippy-toes next to Anne to see the card.Anne handed it over for her to inspect it, and the girl’s eyebrows shot up as she did.“A diamond-bordered card for an apron. That must be a uniquely powerful item,” Elain’e said.“It seems nice,” Anne said. She took the card, concentrated, then cast the apron. It appeared over her hand, and she caught it was quick as she could.The apron was a pleasant pastel pink, with cute little ruffles along the edges. It had the words Your son called me Mommy too written on the front, which she found a little gauche, but also a little funny. She spun it around and looped it around her neck before tying it around her waist with practiced ease.“That’ll help. Now, let’s bake us some cookies, shall we, Miss Elain’e?”

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The audience has: 101 Points!

Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight “These,” Elain’e said as she chewed. “Are pretty good.”Anne beamed across the table at the girl. Between them was a plate stacked high with still-steaming cookies. She was quite proud of her work.There wasn’t any chocolate in the panty, but she did have a whole cart full of mangoes. It was a little touch-and-go as she made up a recipe on the spot, but the cookies had turned out quite nicely. They were crumbly on the outside, with gooey mango sweetness on the inside.Of course, the best part of making cookies was seeing someone enjoy them, and judging by the way Elain’e grabbed a third cookie to nibble at in her cute lady-like way, Anne figured that she had done a decent job of it.“I’m glad you like them so much.”“Maybe we could look into hiring a baker, once all of this stuff is done,” Elain’e said.“You could take up baking yourself,” Anne said. “It’s a lot of fun, I find. It’s an art that you get to eat in the end.”Elain’e chuckled. “Maybe. I never really considered it before. Baking feels more like a peasant’s domain. Um. Not that I mean to offend or anything.”“Oh, nonsense, it would take more than being accused of that to insult me,” Anne said.She held back a grin as Elain’e grabbed a fourth cookie and was about to suggest that maybe Elain’e slow down a little before she gave herself a tummy ache when a distant, muffled explosion sound across the dining room.Elain’e dropped her cookie back atop the plate and jumped to her feet. “What was that?” she asked.“I don’t know,” Anne said. She stood up herself and brushed down the front of her apron. “That noise wasn’t normal?”“No, it’s not. That sounded like an artillery spell impacting.”“That’s not good,” Anne decided. She picked up her skirt and ran after Elain’e as the girl darted out of the dining room and through one of the long corridors of the castle. Elain’e slid to a stop in front of a set of heavy double doors and undid the latch keeping them shut before throwing when open. It led onto a balcony.Anne followed Elain’e onto the overhang, then pressed a hand over her heart as she looked down onto the courtyard before the castle. A large group of skeletons were gathered below, forming a rough circle with swords and spears out, pointing to a figure in their middle.“Newt?” Anne asked as she recognized the girl.“Hello mistress!” the robot called up with a cheery wave.“Stand down,” Elain’e ordered, and the undead below backed up, weapons lowering away from Newt.The robotic girl bent her knees, then jumped up, and with a burst of fire to assist her jump, she landed on the stone railing around the balcony. “Hello Mistress,” she said.“Hello Newt,” Anne said. “Was it you who made that loud bang on arriving?”The robot nodded. “I made several loud noises. One on atmospheric reentry, another on landing. Did I disturb you? I can operate more slowly so as to avoid making so much noise.”“No, no, it’s fine,” Anne said. She tried a smile to reassure the robotic girl that it really was all fine.Newt nodded. “I’m ready for further orders, Mistress.”“Please just call me Anne,” Anne said. “And, ah, we were just enjoying some freshly baked mango cookies in the dining room.”“I am incapable of consuming such things, but I would enjoy being near you while you find sustenance, Anne,” Newt said.Anne glanced at Elain'e who shrugged her shoulders in a rather careless fashion. “Well, come along then!”They returned to the dining room at a much calmer pace than they had left it. Elain’e walking alongside Anne and Newt following half a step behind, her head swivelling left and right as she scanned the castle’s interior.There was a surprise waiting for them in the dining room. A man sitting at the head of the long table that dominated the room. He was sitting back, a wine goblet in one hand and a small porcelain plate sitting before him with the crumbs of a cookie on it.“Oh,” Anne said as she took him in.“Hello, Grand-Patriarch,” Elain’e said. “It’s good to see you awake.”“Indeed,” the man said. He smiled a rather roguish smile, and Anne found herself smiling right back. “I see that we have guests. A pleasure to meet you, ladies.”“The pleasure’s all ours,” Anne said. “I’m Anne, and this is my, um, new friend Newt.”“Salutations!” Newt said.Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.The man chuckled and stood, a hand idly tidying the lapels of his suit jacket. “I’m R’card M’ango,” he said. “I sense that you are as powerful as you are beautiful, Miss Anne.”Anne tittered. “Oh now, you’re hardly one to talk about beauty. I haven’t seen a man as handsome as you in quite some time.”They smiled at each other from across the length of the table.“Miss Elain’e,” Newt said. “I have detected some slight symptoms of sickness. Are you well?”“I’m perfectly fine,” Elain’e said. She grabbed a cookie with rather more aggression than Anne believed the cookie deserved and chomped down on it.“I must say, it’s not every day we have guests here,” R’card said. “Let alone guests from beyond Not Evilia.”“Oh please, R’card, I can’t imagine you not being quite popular,” Anne said.R’card laughed. “And I’m surprised the castle guards aren’t fighting off an army of suitors as we speak. Though, I am being presumptuous. Are you married, Lady Anne?”“I am not,” Anne said.“What a marvelous coincidence, nor am I.”“Please no,” Elain’e whispered.Anne giggled, feeling quite a bit younger all of a sudden. She pulled out the seat opposite R’card’s, which did leave quite a bit of room between them, and sat down. “So, you said that there are few guests to your castle. I’ll admit to a bit of curiosity, what is scaring them all off?”R’card grinned. “Oh, this and that. Though I believe that it might be Not Evilia itself. The same magic that prevents people from entering our fine nation does terrible things to the idea of guests and grand balls.”“That’s very unfortunate,” Anne said. “Did you enjoy the cookies?”R’card blushed, just a little bit, and Anne found that it made his roguish features look tantalizingly innocent. “A little more than I should have, I admit. I wanted to eat only one, but I ended up eating a few more than that.”“Oh, there’s no harm. I’ll take it as a compliment that I can test your self-control.” Anne sighed. “Is there really no way in or our of the country?”“None at all, I’m afraid,” R’card said.“That is not accurate,” Newt chimed in.Everyone turned to look at her.“I successfully excited the country by means of space-flight. I encountered no impediments other than the pull of gravity and typical air resistance.”Elain’e hummed. “I suppose someone could fly over the barrier,” she said. “We do have migratory birds. Though the magic to do so must be very complex.”“Why do you not use an airship?” Newt asked. “I observed an entire fleet of them on my way back down to the Mistress Anne’s current location.”“Pardon?” R’card asked. “A fleet of what?”Newt’s arm twisted and she aimed it towards one of the bare walls of the dining room. An image splashed against the stone wall, slightly warped by the surface. Ships, large mechanical things that should in no way be flying, hovering in the air.There were three dozen of them, all gently moving along while spewing black smoke from chimneys along their tops.“That symbol!” Elain’e said as she jumped to her feet and pointed. She rubbed the crumbs off her mouth with the back of a hand. “That symbol on the bow of the lead vessel. A circle in another circle, black and red. That’s the dark lord’s mark!”“The dark lord?” Anne asked. “The person that’s causing a lot of trouble?”“Well, he’s not flying a fleet over to Not Evilia on a lark,” Elain’e said. “How far away was this fleet, Newt? What heading?”“Over a hundred and twelve kilometers west-north-west, on a heading towards the city to the north east of our current position,” Newt said. “The ships were moving at approximately five knots.”“And so the dark lord brings an army to Not Evilia itself,” R’card said. “An entire city. Nay, an entire nation, that believes itself completely beyond harm. With the barriers up there’s no place to run and evacuate to. And what forces we have here are split between the clans.”“We have to warn people,” Elain’e said. She spun towards R’card. “We have to.”“We do,” he agreed. “Lady Anne, forgive me, but it seems as if things have become quite dire all of a sudden. Hopefully we will be able to resume our conversation at another time.”“Um, yes, I hope so,” Anne said.He nodded, then stood. “I will be going to see those mangy old werewolves. Elain’e, visit the necromancer’s guild. Post haste dear. We have little to no time to waste!”

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The audience has: 155 Points!

Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine Anne climbed aboard the carriage, then adjusted her apron and cloak as she sat down. Elain’e followed her in, then Newt stuck her head into the compartment and looked around. There was a small slit open on her head, and a small antenna dish stuck out of it while spinning. “Interior secure. I will sit at the front of the carriage to observe and protect,” she said before moving back and shutting the door with a heavy click.“Where are we going, exactly?” Anne asked.“There are five clans that make up the leadership of Not Evilia,” Elain’e said. “The necromancers are one of those. They’re the newest of the five major clans. A bit brash, but I think that’s just part of their nature.”“Necromancers,” Anne repeated. “As in, scary people with skeletons and ghouls and such?”Elain’e shrugged. “I never found them scary. A bit socially awkward, if anything. And yes, they do like their ghouls and zombies and the like. Skeletons are more of a M’ango clan thing, actually. As well as vampiric thralls.”“Um,” Anne said.Elain’e reached over the gap between them and patted Anne on the knee. “Don’t worry. We just need to warn them. I don’t know what kind of army the Dark Lord sent here, but it can’t be all that numerous. With the necromancers and the warewolves alerted, they’ll find it a lot harder to take the city that they think.”“I hope so,” Anne said.She leaned back and then raised up her chat to read it. There really wasn’t much else to do in a cramped little carriage, even as it started to rumble out of the castle with a small squad of lantern-carrying undead around it.

Twinge Chat!

Gabriel Minoru says: join the m.i.l.f. initiative!

Phantomxz says: I can’t believe people spent money on an apron

Xxcoder says: yeah, try to herd the cats to get something useful

Haduka dakokty says: Mommy poggers

Jake Mania says: Hey mom! I’m still watching you.

Anne smiled. Her little Jake was still looking out for her. “Oh, poor thing. I wish I was back home with you,” she muttered. “But I’ll be back, one day. You take care of yourself now, okay? You should be heading to bed soon, it’s getting late, I imagine.”

Twinge Chat!

Jake Mania says: Mom!

He who travels the stories says: I was a fool to expect anything decent in this chat.

DieOfSanity says: Mom looks good in that apron

Jagartha says: lol mom’s boy is talking

Bradyman50 says: next time we should buy her chocolate chips

Jake Mania says: don’t worry about my sleep schedule when you’re going to this whole war thing. Stay safe.

Anne nodded. “I’ll do my best,” she said.“Talk to your... otherworldly watchers again?” Elain’e asked.“Yes. They seem like a very unruly bunch, but I think they’re mostly nice kids. The apron was a nice gift, and Newt seems very kind too. I... won’t pretend to really understand how all of this is working though.”“Magic is often like that. The more esoteric kinds moreso.” She smiled at Anne who smiled back. “Get some sleep, Anne. We won’t arrive anywhere until morning.”“Alright,” Anne said. But she couldn’t just fall asleep.She was certainly tired. Nearly exhausted even. She hadn’t had a day this exciting in years. But still, for all that she felt safe in the carriage with Newt and Elain’e, her heart was still thumping along as if the next great adventure was right around the corner.Anne shifted on her seat, legs folding up before her and cloak wrapped around like a big blanket. She stared at the chat, moving up in starts and fits. The numbers had dipped just a little bit. Probably the late hour, she imagined. Or people losing interest in her strange little adventure.

Twinge Chat!

Kotekj says: Mom has a good sense of humour

The God-Emperor says: Hi mom. I’m a naughty boy.

Daystar1998 says: I don’t know what to say to help. This is interactive, right?

ChristopherCraven says: Yeah

Phantom says: The world avoided death by mountain because someone bought a flying android. The graphics are too good for it to be a game. What is this?

MC of my World says: Mom got cockblocked by the dark lord!

Zilfallion says: We should get some AA guns

Legal Ruler says: lol

hoduka dakokty says: lol

Xxcoder says: lol

If you come across this story on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.Anne sighed. The chat was moving along, but it wasn’t being terribly helpful.“Boys,” she said. The chat started to move a little faster, though they were mostly saying that ‘mom’ was paying attention to them. “Boys, we need something to take care of that fleet.”That sparked an argument, one that she saw Jake valiantly trying to moderate with mild success. At least he was trying, even if he should have been in bed already.“Do you think they’ll find a solution?” Elain’e asked.“I hope so,” Anne said as she leaned back. “I can’t for the life of me think of a way to deal with a whole fleet. It’s just... so much. Too much, even. And at this kind of hour.”“We’ll figure it out,” Elain’e said. “The people of Not Evilia have faced plenty of challenges in the past. We’re a tough sort of people.”“You certainly are,” Anne said.Elain’e reached over to one of the books in the middle of a bookstack, turned it into a card, then cast the card the moment it was clear of the stack. She opened the book up and flipped through it. “Right, a small primer on local history then. Not Evilia was founded with the backing of five clans.”“Yours was one of them,” Anne filled in. It had been a long time since she had a history lesson, let alone one taught to her by someone who had a hard time holding up a tome.“Yes. The M’ango family was part of those five. The others are the Necromancer’s association. They’re more of a guild, really. The warewolves, a mercantile group of werewolves who were exiled from Generica. The kobold clan, who serve under the great Pear, and the under-mountain minotaur clan, who escaped from the Drylands. Five groups, five very different backgrounds. They came together here and founded a new city, a new civilization.”“Why did they leave their old homes?” Anne asked. She glanced up as she heard a tap against the wooden roof, then another and another. Soon there was a light drizzle coming down atop them.Elain’e snorted. “Religions, and humanity in general, tend to not be tolerant of anyone that isn’t just like them. The elves are, if anything, worse.”“Oh,” Anne said. There was something uncomfortable about having someone so young be so nihilistic. “Should we get a cloak for Newt? She’s going to be cold out there.”“If she’s truly a golem of one sort or another, then she’ll be fine,” Elain’e said. “Though I wouldn’t begrudge her staying in here with us. I’ve never seen an automaton quite so well articulated, and while it’s not my area of expertise, I wouldn’t mind see how she works.”“We’ll see how she feels,” Anne said. She made a note not to leave the two girls in the same room together while alone. She could vividly remember a smaller Jake taking apart her alarm clock.The air before her twisted, and Anne gasped as a card appeared out of thin air. She caught it in both hands, then squinted at it. “The Weatherator,” she said.“The what?” Elain’e asked.“It looks like something from a cartoon,” Anne said. The image was of a large, boxy device with a handlebar on the side covered in whirly thingamajigs. It reminded her of some of the ‘mad science’ things from Jake’s cartoons. The front of it had a screen next to some dials.“May I see it?” Elain’e asked.“It looks pretty small,” Anne said. She frowned, then cast the card.The weatherator landed on her lap, and she picked it up before a bounce on the road could send it tumbling to the floor. The machine had a few lights on it that started to flicker, and a the vacuum tubes jutting out of its side started to glow.“What is it?” Elain’e asked.“I think,” Anne said as she turned it this way and that. The screen read ‘currently cloudy with a chance of rain.’ “I think it’s a machine to control the weather?”“Truly?” Elain’e asked.Anne grabbed the biggest knob on the device, then twisted it a little. The screen clicked through a few options before she settled on ‘cloudless.’It took all of twenty seconds for the rain to stop and for the world outside of the carriage-which was turning darker as night approached-to brighten. “Oh my. This would have been very handy back home. What with putting the laundry out to hang.”

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The audience has: 127 Points!

Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten “We’re here,” Elain’e said before flicking the curtain over the windows closed. She hopped off her seat, then grabbed onto it as the carriage rumbled to a stop.“Alright, best foot forwards,” Anne said. “We don’t want to make a poor impression. Even if it’s a little late.”“Oh, don’t worry, the necromancers here don’t have any concept of when it is or isn’t appropriate to do anything,” Elain’e said. She opened the door and hopped out, Anne following her at a more sedate and careful pace. Elain’e might have been able to bounce and jump around all day, but Anne wasn’t a teenager anymore. It had been a long time since she’d been able to just casually move around without worrying about twisting an ankle or pulling something.“Oh, this is a... nice place,” Anne said.When Elain’e had told her they were going to visit some necromancers, Anne had built a certain mental image about what their place would look like. Perhaps it had been affected by the M’ango estate.She expected a castle, dark and foreboding, or perhaps an ancient temple or even a large cavern stuck into the side of some large mountain.She was not expecting what was essentially three boxy buildings set in a sort of semi-circle. They looked more like college dorms than foreboding, brooding places where the dead were raised.“It’s the middle one,” Elain’e said with a gesture to said building. “The other two are their living spaces. The middle building’s where they do all their experimenting and their... playing.”A thump by Anne’s side announced Newt’s arrival. “I’m by your side, Mistress,” the gynoid said.“Thanks, Newt,” Anne said.They left the carriage behind and headed towards the middlemost building. Some of the windows had lights on within, and Anne noticed some forms shambling by. It might have been spooky, but the experior was well-lit by streetlamps, and the lawns around the area were well-trimmed and cared for.Elain’e walked right up to the door, then pulled a cord next to it. A bell tolled within. Not an ominous, deep toll, but rather a lacklustre clanking that told people that they had guests.Anne was increasingly underwhelmed by the necromancer’s compound.“Yes, hello?” The door opened and a young man stuck his head out. He was in his late teens, with greasy hair and a slight acne problem. He was also wearing office clothes, though his tie was crooked. He stared first at Anne, then at her chest, then at Newt, and finally at a very unamused Elain’e. “Uh.”“Hello, Joshua,” Elain’e said. “I need to talk to everyone.”“Oh, hey, it’s Elain’e,” the young man said. He smiled, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “What are you doing here at this hour?”“Joshua,” Elain’e said. “I need to talk to everyone. Now.”“Uh, come on in?” he said before stepping back from the doorway. “I’ll go get, um, everyone.”Anne watched the boy run off then glanced down at Elain’e. “He was a little strange.”“Everyone here is more than a little strange. Joshua once tried to... woo me. I put him in his place in as memorable a way as I could manage. I don’t think he’ll ever forget.”“Oh,” Anne said. The boy was... far too old to be trying anything of the sort with Elain’e, no matter how old she claimed to be. Anne’s impression of him decreased quite a bit.They stepped into a lobby space, then pushed through into a large open room with couches arranged in a circle in the middle and two fireplaces on opposite ends. A staircase at the rear led up to a floor above, and a blackboard on wheels sat in the middle of the room with all sorts of doodles on its surface.Anne jumped as someone shambled into the room. A zombie, she guessed from the way they moved and the fact that part of their head was missing. They were wearing a maid’s outfit, and someone had tied a duster to their hand which they waved around at the shelves hanging off the walls.Said shelves were covered in small statuettes of mythical creatures and women in intricately designed armour.It reminded her a little of a richer, classier version of her Jake-i-poo’s bedroom.The sounds of people coming down the stairs had Anne paying a bit more attention. There were four of them, and Anne had to wonder if all the clans and factions were that small. The four were dressed in button-up shirts and slacks, with ties hanging before them. It looked a little out of place, but Anne wasn’t going to comment.Did you know this story is from Royal Road? Read the official version for free and support the author.“Where’s the rest of you?” Elain’e asked.Joshua rubbed at the back of his neck. “Ah, well, we’re the ones who are awake. Higgins is in his lab. Marie’s asleep. A few of the others are in the city. You know, you didn’t exactly send a letter telling me you’d come.”“Fine,” Elain’e said. “Why are you all dressed like that?”“Oh! We’re doing a live-action role play session upstairs. Offices and Organizers. It’s where we-”He stopped as Elain’e raised a hand. “No. No, forget I asked,” Elain’e said.“Yeah, okay,” Joshua said.Anne felt a little bad for him. It was strange for someone who was an adult to be playing pretend, but as long as they weren’t hurting anyone, she didn’t really mind it. He seemed rather shy, and his friends were no better.“Well, the four of you will have to do,” Elain’e said.“Do what, exactly?” One of the other boys asked. “And who are your pretty friends, Elain’e?” The other boys chuckled in that way boys did.“This is the Hero Anne,” Elain’e said. “She’s a summon from another world, called here by ancient magics to defeat the Dark Lord. And that’s an automaton she... made after arriving here. It’s name is Newt.”“Salutation!” Newt said.“Hello,” Anne said. “I’m hardly all that much of a hero, really. Just a single mom, doing her best.”One of the boys walked over to Anne and tried to tower over her, but he was a few centimetres too short to pull it off. “A hero, Elain’e, really?” he asked.Anne reached up, licked the pad of her tongue, then carefully grabbed the boy’s face with her other hand and rubbed a spot off his cheek. “Ink stains. And all over your shirt too. You shouldn’t chew your pens young man. It’s bad for your teeth.”The others snickered and Elain’e sighed. “I don’t have time to explain everything to you morons.”“Hey!” Joshua said. “We’re not morons. We’re the proud members of the necromancer’s guild, one of the five leading organizations that run the equally proud nation of Not Evilia.”“Newt,” Elain’e said. “Can you show us what you saw?”“Certainly, pseudo-daughter Elain’e,” Newt said. She turned towards the wall with the fewest things on it and projected the same footage of ships in the distance.The necromancers seemed suitably impressed. “Whoa! That illusion is incredible.”“Imagine the potential!”“You could set something like that up over a game board, have changing landscapes. Or projects like... why are you looking at me ly that, Elain’e?”Elain’e glared, then pointed to the projection. “That’s what Newt saw near the border into Not Evilia a few hours ago. Airships. Airships with the Dark Lord’s mark on their bows and flags who are heading right for Not Evilia as we speak.”“Oh,” Joshua said.The boys all froze for a long moment before one of them spoke up. “That’s not good.”“Of course it’s not good, you morons!” Elain’e snapped. “We’re about to be invaded. Probably tonight, or tomorrow morning at the latest, and no one is expecting it. We need to mobilize, to prepare for war!”“That’s why you’re here?” Joshua asked. “To warn us. Because you want our troops! ““Yes,” Elain’e said.“What about your clan, what are you bringing to the table?” One of the boys asked.Elain’e glare grew even more fierce, and some cards appeared in her hands. “I’m bringing you advance warning, and a hero with powerful magic. All you guys can bring are a few rotten corpses to slow them down while we do all the work. Don’t start playing that game with me, boy. You’re a hundred years too young to play politics on my level.”Anne folded her hands together. “Um, it really would be nice if all of your boys helped us. We could use a few strong, strapping lads to, ah, hold the line and show us how tough they are.”The boys looked between each other, then elected Joshua as spokesperson.“Okay,” he said. “We’ll wake up the dead. Show that Dark Lord what we can do. Just you wait, we’re sure to impress!”

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The audience has: 156 Points!

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven Things started happening very quickly, at least as far as Anne was concerned.The necromancer boys ran off this way and that, and soon the building was filled with zombies jogging around while carrying sacks full of gear and skeletons carried equipment through the building and back outside.Anne fretted about, a little worried, and also a little tired. It was getting late. The grandfather clock in the entrance loung read that it was past eleven in the evening. Anne was usually in bed by ten, and the day had been more exciting than she was used to.“We’re ready,” Joshua said as he burst into the room. His office garb was gone, replaced by thick robes of a dark, nearly-burgundy, red.“All of you?” Elain’e asked.“No, of course not,” he said. “But the four of us who were here are, and two others. We’re heading out now, to get to Not Evilia. We’re leaving two members behind to watch over the place with a skeleton crew of skeletons. The rest will take a while to prepare. We’re bringing maybe a third of the undead we have with us.”“Just a third?” Elain’e asked.“That’s still nearly two hundred,” Joshua defended. “It’s a fair amount, I think.”“With the number of ships that the Dark Lord brought, we could be facing ten times that many troops, and I doubt he’d go through that much trouble to send over chaff.”“What kind of, ah, person fights in the Dark Lord’s army?” Anne asked.“Humans,” Elain’e said with the same tone someone else might use for a curse. “Packed in tight, with some of them voluntarily being turned into cards? There could be thousands of them on each ship. But I doubt that.”“I hope that’s not the case,” Joshua said.“I don’t think so. The Dark Lord is supposed to be exceptionally vile in his recruitment and training. His army will be made up of the best,” Elain’e said.“And we’re all that will be between him and a whole city full of innocents,” Anne whispered.Elain’e nodded. “Are your armies moving already?” Elain’e asked.“They are,” Joshua said. He stepped out of the way of another necromancer who ran past, a host of skeletons following him.“Come on, we’re moving!” the necromancer said.Anne swallowed. The boyish silliness was all gone now. “You boys are very brave,” she said.Joshua’s cheeks reddened. “Ah, thanks, miss. Um. Maybe tell that to the others too? I’m sure it’ll give them a little bit of heart before we face unfortunate odds.”Anne smiled. “I’ll see what I can do,” she said.“We have our part to do too,” Elain’e said. “We need to get to Not Evilia post-haste.”“To warn more people?”Elain’e shook her head. “To stall the enemy. Your weather-controlling device. I think we might be able to use it well here. Even just heavy rain would stall them, I think. They won’t land in Not Evilia. That would be foolish. They need space to deploy and spread out and form up their army. Muddying the ground would complicate that, maybe even demoralize them a little bit. Fog would hamper their visibility. If we can manage something like a storm, that... would do a lot too.”“I’ll do what I can,” Anne said.“And I will assist!” Newt replied. She smiled and gave everyone a thumb’s up. “Terminating adversarial lifeforms is what I was designed for!”Elain’e started towards the exit. “We’re taking off now, heading towards the city. They should be coming in from the west, so that’s where we’ll be.”“Great,” Joshua said. “Do you think you’ll be able to inform the city guard? The Minotaurs and Kobold clans should be told too.”“Then send someone to tell them,” Elain’e said. “We’ll be a bit busy saving everyone.”Anne jogged after Elain’e as the girl spun around and walked out of the room. She looked like she was trying hard to walk imperiously and sweep her skirts around as she did so, but all she succeeded in doing was to flounce out the door in a manner that was more cute than intimidating.A small army was gathering outside, dozens and dozens of skeletons and zombies, all lined up and being outfitted with swords and armour by some hurried young men before they were turned into cards.They returned to the carriage, Newt opening the door again, and climbed in. “Will they bring all the undead as cards?” Anne asked.“Hmm? No, there’s no way they can do that. The necromancers are somewhat decent mages, but their mana pools aren’t nearly so impressive. They’ll carry a dozen or so with them, maybe less. The rest will have to march.”“Is it far?” Anne asked.“To Not Evilia? No, it’s not too far. An hour, maybe? You might want to rest. I know you need your sleep.”Anne rolled her eyes. Teenagers always thought that adults had never spent a whole night awake before. It was quite silly.“Does the city have any defences?” Newt asked.“Not really, no,” Elain’e said. “There are some walls, but the city’s outgrown them a little. A lot of homes aren’t going to be protected. If anything the wall will hamper any defences, make mobility harder within the city. I don’t know if we have any real siege equipment either.”This tale has been unlawfully obtained from Royal Road. If you discover it on Amazon, kindly report it.“No one was expecting trouble,” Anne guessed.“That’s pretty much it, yeah,” Elain’e said. “Not Evilia has its barrier. Other than a few pests like moblins, the entire nation is pretty safe. More so than many of the cities outside of Not Evilia.”Anne shifted things around so that she could sit with her legs pressed up to her chest. She... didn’t quite know how to feel about everything. She glanced to her chat for help, for a reassuring word or two.There were fewer people online still. Did they not care? Maybe they thought the entire thing was made up. Part of her wanted to believe that too, but she couldn’t, not when everything was so real.

Twinge Chat!

Xcoder says: Let the winds blow!

Skippyrebo says: Someone buy mom a yellow raincoat!

Liorean says: Can’t wait to see the storm!

MC of my World says: The graphics for the skeletons are insanely good

BreakerMouse says: Yeah

Hewhotravelsthestories says: Using a weather controlling device for laundry! Powergamer mom

Taverius says: When a good mom goes to war...

Cenred_58 says: Pog mom. Mommers!

ChristopherCraven says: Mommers!

Qmills88 says: Mommers!

Anne rolled her eyes and scrolled down past the stream of ‘mommers.’

Twinge Chat!

GKnight says: Who bought mom a doomsday device?

Breaker says: Hey, did Jake turn off the oven?

Kjoatmon says: I love the weeb representation with the necromancers. This ARC has nice stuff

Malady says: Are the necrobros recruiting?

Anne closed her eyes. Nothing too helpful there. And nothing from Jake. Maybe he’d finally gone to bed? That would be responsible of him.“All the gods.”Anne glanced up and found Elain’e hovering by the window of the carriage, the curtains shoved aside and her face pressed right up against the glass.Sitting up, Anne climbed to her feet and leaned down next to Elain’e. It only took her a moment to find what the girl was looking at.In the distance, near large hills, were large black forms gently descending towards the ground. Spotlights beneath them created yellow beams from the ship’s bellies and into the green canopy beneath them as they lowered themselves down.Anne twisted to the side, and she could see the lights of a city ahead of them. It wasn’t so far off anymore. “How far apart are they?” she whispered.“Triangulating,” Newt said. “Approximately seventeen kilometres between the landing zone and the edge of the city.”“They’re not too far,” Elain’e said. “At that distance, the city might not be able to tell what the ships are, not without investigating further. And it should only take a well-trained soldier a few hours to run between their landing area and the city.”“Additionally, the distance should allow the invading force to see any counter-attacks coming. Possibly in time to react by retreating back into the air. They are also far outside of the range of any conventional siege equipment,” Newt said.“Even the more powerful magical effects would break apart before reaching that kind of range,” Elain’e said. “They might also be deploying only some of their army there. They have the mobility to move and place their army wherever they wish.”“Oh,” Anne said. She wasn’t great at that kind of thing. Tactics and such were way beyond her, though she had listened to Jake ranting about some strategy games before. “Mobility is important. And they’re flying. Does Not Evilia have anything for that?”“Up close? Yes. There are some flying monsters, and I think the city has a few ballistea to scare them off. But otherwise, no.”Anne swallowed. She flicked her wrist, not as elegantly as Elain’e did, but it worked. A card appeared in her hands, and she cast it, summoning her weather machine.“I thing... we might be able to do something,” she said.Elain’e glanced at the device. “Do what you can,” she said. “You’ll be saving lives for every hour we gain.”Anne nodded. She grabbed the knob on the front and twisted it. Past cloudy, past drizzle, past rain, and then onto summer storm. Was that enough?Distant lightning lit up the sky a moment before a drizzle started to fall around them. Anne sat back as, over the course of a few minutes, it turned to proper rain with a few rumbles from far away. She hesitated. There were more options in the machine.Turning the knob again, she paused on true storm, then clicked it over one more notch and stopped at last on hail storm.The first clinks of ice started to hit the carriage, accompanied by stronger rain and a wind that was steadily picking up.She hoped that it was enough to discourage that bad guys and get them to head back home.

* * *

The audience has: 180 Points!

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve The carriage stopped, and Anne glanced out the windows. All she could see was a torrent of rain, with the occasional glimmer of light to their right, and the sporadic burst of lightning turning night to day with unpredictable flashes.“We can’t get out in this,” Elain’e said.“Likelihood of injury caused by standing in exposed weather: moderate to high. I would advise against leaving the confines of this vehicle,” Newt said.Anne nodded. It wasn’t nice out there, and even in the carriage it was hard to hear the others speaking over the clatter of hail against the roof. It was probably a good thing that the carriage was pulled by undead horses, really.“I think I can tone it all down,” she said. “If we want to be able to go outside.”“We don’t have much of a choice. I doubt they’ll call off their invasion, even with things as bad as they are,” Elain’e said. “We need to get a lay of the land, see what we can, and find a way to better prepare for their first assault.”“How long do we have?” Anne asked.Elain’e shrugged. “A couple of hours, I’d guess.”“That’s both too long, and not long enough,” Anne said. She pulled up her weather machine, then twisted the dial back until it stopped on ‘light rain.’ enough to annoy, but not enough to really harm. At least, she hoped.She imagined that the army unloading from their ships must have been taken aback by two hours of non-stop winds and hail. It was too much to ask that they take the storm as a sign that they should go back home.The hail stopped, and soon the wind that was whipping at the carriage so hard that it rocked calmed down. Anne leaned forwards and looked out onto the city of Not Evilia.It wasn’t that big of a city. A few thousand homes, all built around a river that switched back and forth though the middle of it all. A few hills beneath the city gave some sections a better vantage over the others, and it was mostly surrounded by flat fields where farms had sprouted up to feed the thousands of mouths within.She couldn’t tell much about the architecture in the dark, even if many of the homes still had light pouring out of them from candles and lanterns. So many people living in a quiet, peaceful corner. All of them sleeping through a rough storm, probably glad that the worst of it was done, and entirely unaware that there was a literal army marching on them.Anne opened the door.“It’s still raining!” Elain’e said.“I’m not going to melt from a bit of water,” Anne said. “I’ve been wet before, you know?”Her feet made a wet splat as she landed on the grassy hill they were parked on. They weren’t too far from the forest between Not Evilia and the landing zone the bad guys had picked out for themselves, atop a rise that afforded them a good view of their surroundings.Anne raked her hair back and squinted through the rain. She couldn’t see any army marching towards them, only trees and bushes, with an impenetrable darkness beyond that.“You’re going to catch a cold,” Elain’e said. She hopped down from the carriage, landed with a splash, then daintily raised a lacey-edged umbrella over her head. With just a bit of stretching, she managed to encompass Anne’s head as well.“Thank you,” Anne said.“Well, take it. I have a second umbrella.”Anne giggled. “Two umbrellas? That’s a lot.”“More than that. Though mostly I have parasols.” Elaine waited for Anne to take the umbrella, then she summoned a cart and cast it to reveal a second. She sniffed as she raised it over herself. “Well, that’ll keep us somewhat dry.”“I could stop the rain entirely,” Anne said.“No, best not. Muddy terrain like this will hamper them more than a bit of rain would hamper us.”“So, what do we do now?” Anne asked.Elain’e took in a deep breath, then let it all out in a woosh. “Given that it’s night... on my own, I could go in those woods and maybe take out a few squads. Assuming they have the temerity to send their men out in smaller groups. The woods are a friendly place to someone like myself. But that would only be a fraction of their forces.”“I’d really rather you didn’t head out to do something so dangerous,” Anne said.“I’ll stay here to protect you, of course,” Elain’e said.“I could likely damage and hamper the enemy as well,” Newt said. “If I’m ordered to detonate my self-destruct systems, I might be able to take out two of their ships, assuming they’re near to each other. Otherwise, I can employ hit and run tactics using the forest as partial cover.”If you spot this tale on Amazon, know that it has been stolen. Report the violation.“Forgive me for asking,” Elain’e started. “But do you know how to handle magical attacks?”“By retaliating with overwhelming violence,” Newt said.“Let’s not split up,” Anne said. The last thing she needed was to lose track of the two girls she had sorta taken under her wing.She glanced at her chat for advice.

Twinge Chat!

Underscored says: Dark Lord needs to chill out

Phantom says: he’s very serious

Smuggles999 says: that city looks minuscule

Kotekj says: if mom can control the weather, can she make it cold?

Ganduro says: send NEWT in!

Gabriel minoru says: the dark lord is not pog

Corvid_with_a_sword says: Dark lord is cringe

Ella1ea says: SOMEONE BUY HER A COAT!

Valheru says: Mommers

Gryphonflyt says: AGREED!

Qmills88 says: mommers1

“Boys...” Anne started. “I mean... chat people? Please? I could use some advice. You know this... strategy stuff better than I do. You play games, right?”The chat slowed, then burst with dozens of replies. A lot of people were arguing about... green screens? How everything was part of some really advanced program with drag-and-drop models and fast modellers. Anne didn’t understand that part. She focused on what others were saying.“Anything good?” Elain’e asked.“A few things. But I think they’re thinking too much of me. I’m just a single mom, I can’t take on a whole army on my own, and some of these ideas are very silly.” She glared at the chat. “I’m not going to seduce the dark lord.”Anne blinked as a card appeared before her. The chat went even more wild for a moment, and she noticed that one of the names was highlighted. Someone had made a one-hundred dollar purchase.She glanced at the card.Wall of Duty: was written at the top of the card. A slate-black card that somehow looked just as impressive as the card with the weather controlling device. The image was a painting, one taken from above. An ancient but beautiful city in mid-day, with a grand wall all around it of white stone with towers every hundred metres or so.“Thank you, Tarumath,” Anne said as she hugged the card close. “I... just thank you. You might have saved a lot of people tonight.”“A wall?” Elain’e asked as she stood on tip-toes and looked at the card. “That could help. An entire wall in a card.”Anne nodded. “How do I cast this?”Elain’e looked around, then pointed to the far end of the hill, where it dipped down a little. “Over there. If the wall creates an additional barrier between the city and the army, then that’ll save us a lot of time. They’ll think twice when a wall appears out of nowhere and blocks their path. Even if they can likely fly over it. That’ll mean retreated back to their ships and risking a close-range retaliation against their vessels.”“Right,” Anne said. Half of that flew over her head, but she tried her best to keep up.They walked across the hill, hurried, but not so much so that they wanted to slip on the muddy grass.“Mistress,” Newt said. “I’m detecting several heat signatures from the forest, three hundred and fifty meters to the west.”Anne turned and stared into the woods. She couldn’t see anything, not until a single figure stepped out of the forest. A man, in black clothes with white plate over it. It was hard to make out any features through the rain and in the dark.Another followed, then another and another. Soon she could hear shouts as the men pouring out of the woods started to form up in neat lines.“They are entirely too close for comfort,” Elain’e said. “Quick, the wall, then we rush to the city.”“Right,” Anne said.She placed the card down, then, while biting her lower lips hard enough it hurt, she cast.The wall appeared with a single bang, displaces air pushing out of the place where it now stood. It wasn’t some little wall, or a stoney barrier. It was a massive structure, thirty, maybe forty meters tall, with gleaming white towers that towered even above that. Anne gulped as she strained her neck to look up to the top.Her gaze followed along the wall as she took a step back. It was long. Extraordinary so, turning towards Not Evilia on the ends to properly wrap around the side of the city they were on.“That’ll do,” Elain’e said.

* * *

The audience has: 109 Points!

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Thirteen “Hang on,” Newt said.Anne turned towards Newt, but the robotic girl grabbed her in a princess carry. “Hang on? To whaaaa-” Anne said before her voice trailed off into a high-pitched scream as they took off and flew straight up and over the wall.“Brace,” Newt said as they hit the apex of their flight, then started to come back down.Anne’s scream changed in pitch a moment before they landed with a hard thump atop the wall. She stood up as Newt let go of her, then, with shaky hands, she grabbed onto one of the wall’s crenellations and took a moment just to let her heart still itself.“I’m going to retrieve Elain’e now. One moment please,” Newt said before she stepped up onto the edge of the wall, then over it.Anne sighed, then straightened up and looked down the length of the wall. It was fairly wide at the top, at least a metre or two thick, with a tunnel that cut through the towers along its length, and staircases leading down to the bottom on the inner side.She followed the wall with her gaze, all around the city and back around to where she was. It surrounded all of Not Evilia, an unmistakable white barrier that enclosed all of the city’s farmland and homes. It made the little city seem even smaller.People were awake, the appearance of the wall probably serving as a pretty good sign that something was going on. Torch-light moved around inside the city, and Anne saw a few groups of what she thought might be guards running towards the wall, though few of them were heading in the right direction.“We have returned!” Newt announced as she carried Elain’e up the wall.The young woman landed with a huff, her dress now wet and her haid bedraggled by the short flight. She wiggled her umbrella, then moved it back over her head. Anne had to hold back a giggle. She looked like a wet cat.“That was deeply unpleasant,” Elain’e said. But I suppose this makes us safer than remaining down there.”“Your carriage,” Anne said.“It's just a carriage. It is entirely replaceable. And I doubt the Dark Lord’s army will truly bother with it. They have greater concerns. This wall will likely cause them a great deal of consternation.”“It won’t be enough to stop them though,” Anne said.“No, of course not,” Elain’e replied. “They’re incredibly far from home, and I imagine that whatever information they had on Not Evilia, it was somewhat dated and they were aware that it might not be accurate. They will have come prepared for the unexpected. At least, if they’re not fools.”“So what do we do?” Anne asked. She glanced back at where the lights from what she assumed were guards were poking at parts of the wall that were nearest the city. “The people in the city don’t know yet, do they?”“They don’t,” Elain’e said. “The necromancers haven’t arrived yet. I suspect it’ll take them another little while. And the wall might stall there. There seems to be a gatehouse over there, but it’s likely unmanned.”“I can assist,” Newt said.Elain’e frowned, then nodded. “You can,” she said. She tugged off one of her dainty gloves, then pulled a large ring off of her middle-finger. “Here. This is my signet ring. You’ll want to give it to the captain of the guard. Explain what’s going on to him. We need that gate over there opened for the necromancer’s guild to enter, and we need this section of the wall here manned. Tell him to bring rocks.”Newt took the ring carefully, then turned to Anne. “Oh,” Anne said. “Yes, that’s fine.”“Wait,” Elain’e said. “Once you’ve told the guard captain what he needs to know, go find the necromancers. You should be able to see them from above with relative ease.”Newt saluted, then with a starting jog, she took off and ran off the edge of the wall a moment before taking off with a rush of flames and smoke trailing after her.“That just leaves the two of us to take care of all of that,” Elain’e said. She placed a hand on her hip and glared out into the darkness beyond the wall. It wasn’t entirely dark, not really. There was light around the army forming in the distance.Anne swallowed as she took in the growing mass of soldiers, all of them running around until they were in neat rows. She imagined there were two or three hundred of them already, men in plate and mail, with square shields and short swords. Those on the back lines were making spears appear out of cards, and others were testing bowstrings against the effects of the rain.A case of literary theft: this tale is not rightfully on Amazon; if you see it, report the violation.“That’s a lot of men,” Anne said.“They have ladders,” Elain’e said. She pointed to a group of them who did, indeed, have ladders. They were tying the bottoms and ends of ladders together, making them into single, longer ladders. “I guess they were prepared for the smaller walls that Not Evilia has. They’ll still be able to scale this one.”“What do we do?” Anne asked.“We summon our own army,” Elain’e said. “You still have that one card?”Anne swallowed. “The Army of Jake Maia?” she asked.“It’s an army.”“It’s an army of my little boy,” Anne said.Elain’e worked her jaw. “I think your little boy is still back home, Anne. It won’t really be him. And besides.” She gestured to the city. “How many little boys and girls are just resting peacefully over there?”Anne chewed on her lip. “Fine,” she said.There wasn’t any time for moralizing, for questioning herself on what was the right thing to do.And honestly, she wanted to see her little Jake-i-poo some more.“We should do it on the ground, come on,” Elain’e said. She grabbed Anne by the hand, and together they climbed down the stairs at the back of the wall to the grassy hillside below.Anne fished out the card in question, then hugged it close for a moment. “Same as the wall?” she asked.“That’s right,” Elain’e said.Anne stepped up, knelt down, then placed the card down a moment before summoning it.Between one blink and the next, the field around them filled with young men. Her son, but a hundred times over.They weren’t in the best of shape. The entire army was dirty and looked banged up. They had old armour on, metal plates over rough gambesons, and their weapons seemed dulled and often broken. They looked tired.“Oh, no,” Anne gasped. She bolted to the nearest Jake, then hugged him close. “Oh you poor sweetie, what happened to you? Are you alright?”“Mom?” the Jake she was hugging said. “No, mom, don’t hug me, I’m all dirty.”“Shh, shh,” she shhed him before she started to rock him back and forth. “It’s okay, I’m here.”“Mom, you’re embarrassing me in front of myself,” Jake whined. “A-and who’s that cute girl behind you?”“She’s far too young for you, mister Maia. Now, if you want your mom to help you find a girl, you only need to ask. I know all the ladies in town, and quite a few of them have-”“No, no mom. Don’t.”“So this is your son?” Elain’e asked. She had one eyebrow perked as she looked over all the Jakes. They were mostly starting to sit down in the grass, despite the rain still falling atop them.Anne nodded. “Yes, this is definitely my Jake-i-poo. Though, I usually insist that he dresses a little better, and that he showers more often.”“Mom,” the Jake she was still holding onto said. There wasn’t much strength in the complaint. He was tired, bags under his eyes, and he moved as if his limbs were heavy.“Well, get on the wall,” Elain’e said. “We have an army to defend against. I can’t imagine they’ll sit around for all that long.”“I... I don’t think we can,” Jake said. “We’re tired. Burnt out. Our gear’s wrecked and... look, we just can’t.”Anne bit her lip. Could she really order her son to go and fight a battle that wasn’t his? Was he even her son, really?A flash dragged her attention down, and she only-just managed to catch a card that appeared out of nowhere before her. She stepped to the side, and ducked down to be under the cover of Elain’e’s umbrella.“A new card?” Elain’e asked.“Yes,” Anne said. She squinted at the card. It had a nice, clean border, and an image of Jake on it. A very handsome jake, with a bit more of a chin than he actually had and just a pinch of stubble. He was also wearing a black uniform, with a cap on that had a skull on the front. He looked like an officer out of some strange war movie.“Commissar Jake?” Elain’e read the card’s name.“Um,” Anne said. She wasn’t sure what to think of that. “Should we use this?”“I suppose there’s no harm,” Elain’e said.Anne nodded, then cast the card.

* * *

The audience has: 32 Points!

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen “Boys!”The shout rang across the field, loud and clear and ringing.Commissar Jake adjusted his hat, then brushed some imaginary dust off the lapels of his coat. “Boys! Sons of Anne. Look at you. Pitiful wretches! Stand the hell up and pay attention, ladies!”The army laid out on the field looked to each other, then glanced back at the commissar.“I said stand up!” Commissar Jake screamed so hard it sounded as though he was tearing up his own throat. “You piles of degenerate filth, it’s not time for you to be laying your asses down on the ground to contemplate the worthlessness of your miserable lives! This is a time to fight, mom-damn it! Now get those boots planted on the ground or I’m going to plant mine right up your asses! On the double, boys!”Anne gasped, a hand pressed up over her mouth. Those were some very strong things that this Jake was saying.“That’s more like it. Now form a line. You do know what a line is? You might have spent all of math class staring at Mrs Cindy’s perfectly round bottom but I expect at least that much to have sunk into that thick skull of yours! That’s right. Side by side.”The Jakes, still tired, and still confused, formed an somewhat orderly line under the cruel glare of Commissar Jake.“Do you maggots have any idea what we’re up against? A whole damned army of blood-thirsty maniacs. Worshippers of a being so vile the mere sight of him will have you wanting to run back to hug your damned body pillows. They are hardened killers. They are freaks of nature.” Commissar Jake swept around and balled his hands into fists. “They want to harm our momma.”A collective gulp sounded out across the field.“Will you let them do that?”There was a long stretch of silence, broken only by some mutters.“Have you been listening to shit music too loud for too long? You aren’t deaf, are you? I asked you if you were going to let those ingrates hurt our momma?!”“No,” came a few calls.“What kind of unenthusiastic response is that? That was weaker than that time you asked Sally White out for prom and she rejected your sorry asses.”Anne gasped again. Jake had asked that nice girl out? And she’d rejected him? Oh, the poor baby, no wonder he had been so upset that week.“I want you to sound off loud and clear. This isn’t a game, this isn’t some bullshit. This is a war! Do you understand?”“Yes!”“That’s ‘yes sir,’ to you, you lower lifeforms! Do you understand that?”“Sir, yes sir.”“Say it like you damned well mean it!”“Sir yes sir!” the Jake’s cried out.“If it was up to me I’d have to all lynched for incompetence. Look at yourselves. Does mom not give you clean clothes? Does she not feed you? Does she not give you the love and attention you so obviously failed to earn?”Commissar Jake stomped over to one Jake in particular.“Why are you slouched?”“Sir?”“I asked you why you were slouching, boy. Are you looking for your pecker past that gut of yours? You’re going to need to bend over a whole lot more than that and find yourself a magnifying glass, you lump of shit. Stand taller, dammit!”The commissar stomped over to another.“Where is your weapon?”“Uh, sir, its, uh.”“Uh? What in the mom-damn does uh mean? Raise your fists. Come on, are you too lazy to do that much? I’m not asking you to clean out the toilets, I’m telling you to raise your fists!”The wide-eyed Jake did as he was told, raising his fists before his face.“That stance is pitiful! Punch me.”“What?”“Did I stutter?” the commissar slapped himself on the chest. “Punch me!”Jake punched him.The commissar barely budged. Then he slapped Jake across the face. “Weak! Punch me like that man you wish you were, you overgrown mistake! And if you can’t do that much, then find a weapon, because if that’s all the punching you can do then by mom you’d best hope that the freaks on the other side of that wall are just as pathetic as the rest of you, because they will have you for a midnight snack.”Commissar Jake moved on to the next Jake in line, one who was holding a sword by his side.“What is your name?”“Sir, Jake Mia-”“Wrong!” the commissar interrupted. “From now on your name is Swordy McStabby. Is that your weapon, Swrdy?”Royal Road is the home of this novel. Visit there to read the original and support the author.“Sir, yes sir.”“And what will do with it?” the commissar asked.Swordy McStabby gulped. “I’m going to stab the enemy, sir!”“Well mom-damn, you must have been given some of the brain cells the rest of this sorry lot are missing. You’re right, McStabby, that’s exactly what you will do. You will stand side-by-side with yourself on the top of that wall and everytime one of those twinkle-toed dipshits pokes his ugly mug over the edge of that mom-blessed wall, you will take that rusty bit of iron and you will ram it into their eyeholes. Is that right?”“Sir, yes sir!”“Exactly! Because I am always right. Only one person knows better than me, and that’s our glorious momma. Isn’t that right, boys?”“Sir, yes, sir!”“You will go up that wall, and you will shout, and you will scream, and you’re going to bleed and die for Momma, because she’d do the same for you even if you clearly don’t deserve it! And you will hate every last minute of it! Do you know why?”“Sir, no, sir!”“Because they don’t have milkshakes and anime on top of that wall! You will not be served a fresh helping of chicken tendies and some girl-on-girl porn up there. You will be given death and dismemberment, and by mom, you will hate every last second of it. But you will do it anyway. Because mom has had to endure your worthless, whining presence for your entire damned life and she deserves every ounce of pain you’ll suffer tonight. Am I understood?”“Sir, yes, sir!”“Bullshit! I didn’t hear you!”“Sir, yes, sir!”“That’s right! Now pick up your weapons and get up on that wall. Those bastards won’t gut themselves.”The Jakes screamed, raising spears and swords above their heads, a hundred voices joining together in a call to feral and wild that Anne didn’t recognize her own son’s voice for a moment. Then they charged up the wall, a few stragglers rushing back to grab some equipment left on the field before they too ran up the wall.At the top, the army spread out, momentarily disorganized before they started to form a long line, a Jake at every gap between crenellations.“Well,” Elain’e said. She was a little flushed under her umbrella. “That was certainly something.”“Um, yes,” Anne said.“Don’t worry mom,” Commissar Jake said as he approached her. “I’ll keep an eye on myself. Make sure we give those heathens a reason to think twice about messing with you.”“Thanks?” Anne said.The commissar saluted her smartly, then with one hand tucked into his uniform pocket, he walked with a straight back up the steps. Anne heard him shouting obscenities a moment later, telling the other Jakes to stand taller and insulting the manhood of their adversaries in the same breath.“I feel like I should wash his mouth off with soap,” Anne said.“That’s... somehow a very intimidating thing to say, Anne,” Elain’e said.Anne considered it for just a moment before a giggle escaped her. “Maybe. What do we do now?”“Now we wait,” Elain’e said. “The necromancers will be coming soon, and with them a lot more troops, of the more disposable sort. And I think those lights approaching us over there are some guardsmen. My grand-patriarch won’t fail to rally the werewolves either, so we can expect supplies eventually.”“Won’t those only be useful if this goes on for a while?” Anne asked.“Yes, and thanks to you, the wall, that army up there, there’s a good chance that this invasion will turn from a sacking to a siege. If we can endure until sun-up, then we’ll have every able-bodied person in Not Evilia here helping us. Even just flinging rocks over the wall should make them think twice. And I think that their goal was to hit the city in the dead of night, entirely unaware. It’s a lot different to come against a city that’s expecting the attack and is preparing for it.”“I suppose so,” Anne said.She glanced back up the wall while fiddling with the edge of her apron. Her Jakes were up there, cursing and flinging enthusiastic insults at the army just on the other side.She hoped things would go well.Her more pragmatic side told her optimistic side not to expect the best. But... still. It was never wrong to hope.

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The audience has: 70 Points!

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen “Come on,” Elain’e said.Anne glanced around, then followed after the girl as she started up the stairs. “Where are we going?” Anne asked.“To the top of that tower. It has narrow stairs, it’s tough, and it will give us a good vantage. It’s likely the safest place to be while remaining close to the battle,” Elain’e said. “And I have a few spells I was saving for a rainy day that I can use from up there.”“Oh, alright,” Anne said.They climbed up the wall one step at a time, Anne being careful because they were a little slippery, what with the rain and all.They reached the top, and Anne couldn’t help but pause to touch some of the Jakes they crossed. Her little boy, in all of his variations here, was putting up a brave face, but she was his mom, and she could tell that he was nervous under all that bluster.“Anne!” Elain’e called out from next to the tower.Anne picked up her skirts and ran to catch up to the girl.The inside of the tower had little rooms on separate floors, with arrowslit windows looking out on either end of the wall. They climbed up and up, Anne’s breathing becoming a little ragged. She wasn’t sure if she was wet because of all the rain, or if it was sweat clinging to her.She missed warm showers and freshly laundered clothes.The top of the tower was a wide platform with waist-high walls around it and peaked roof above, held in place by carefully crafted arched pillars.The view was spectacular. Though it was still dark, they could see for quite a ways. The forest stretched out, thousands of trees swaying in the rain-swept wind, the city behind them, an array of flickering lights and glowing windows.The Dark Lord’s army was arrayed out ahead of them. Groups of men at least a hundred strong in long, rectangular boxes. Anne counted half a dozen such formations, and a few smaller ones at the rear, with men in different gear. “How many?” Anne asked.“That seems like one arm of the Dark Lord’s forces,” Elain’e said. “At least a thousand in all. I imagine they can fit about a hundred men in each one of their airships then.”“That’s a lot of people,” Anne said.“Well, the good news is that while we might not be able to match them man-for-man, it’ll cost them a lot to take the city. Eventually it’ll cost them too much. Even the Dark Lord’s army will break after sufficient losses. We just need to inflict those as quickly as we can.”Anne swallowed. That was a lot of death. She gazed down at the army, standing in their neat rows, then she waited... and waited. “Why aren’t they doing anything?” she asked.Elain’e snorted. “Of, they’re doing something. See those runners moving across the backline?” She pointed and Anne finally spotted a few smaller soldiers darting around. “They’re going in and out of the woods. The Dark Lord’s forces have card-throwers. These little devices that can fling a card out twenty or thirty metres like a bolt. They’re picking up stones and trunks and whatever else they can grab that’s heavy.”“Why?” Anne asked.“To hit the wall once they’re close. This wall looks sturdy enough, but it’ll crumble eventually, with enough stones crashing into it fast enough. Few things can endure a constant bombardment like that.”“Oh,” Anne said. “Should we do the same?”“We... probably should, yes. I didn’t consider it before. Stay here, Anne, I’ll go inform the commissar. There’s not much time to be wasted picking up rocks out of the field, but even just some cast stones is better than none.”Anne watched Elain’e go, then held onto the edge of the wall. Her hands became wet, and chilly, but for the moment the cold was something of a comfort.“This is... not what I was hoping for,” she muttered.

Twinge Chat!

Ella1ea says: AN ARMY OF JAKE-I-POOS TO BLOT OUT THE SUN!

Dalewarrior says: All hail the Mommisiah! All hail the Momperor!

Rusty Knight says: Jake’s gonna die when he sees this

Zilfallion says: Get a tank! Hit them with your sword!

Taverius says: The planet fell before Jake did!

MC of my World says: This is just traumatizing mom

InvaderNio says: How did they film this?

Gss says: For mom!

Qmills88 says: Did this transport the real Jake over?

FoolRegnant says: In the grim darkness of the future, there is only mom

He who travels the stories says: I’m still embarrassed for Jake

This book was originally published on Royal Road. Check it out there for the real experience.Anne chuckled. The little dears were having some fun, at least. That was nice to see.The sound of something like air hissing out of a hose had Anne turning just in time to see something zip through the sky, slow down, then twist into the tower. It was Newt, the girl landed just before her, robotic legs folding in on themselves to hide the thrusters within. “Salutations!” Newt said. “My mission has been a mild success.”Anne stared at arrow currently lodged in Newt’s chest. “You were shot!”“It’s just a scratch,” Newt said.“It’s a hole in your chest!” Anne said, louder this time.“Merely a flesh wound!”“Newt!” Anne said. She rushed over to the girl and touched the arrow. It was stuck fast in Newt’s clothes, the arrowhead jammed between two metallic plates on the robot-girl’s ribs. “You’re not bleeding,” Anne said.“I have no blood to bleed with,” Newt replied. She reached up, grabbed the arrow, then yanked it out. “See, all is well.”“Who shot you?” Anne asked.“The captain of the guard did. You will be pleased to learn that our allies have great aim with their shortbows. I suspect that they trained by hunting flying creatures. The captain has been informed about the oncoming invasion. I suspect that he is rallying troops now. The south gate has been opened as well.”“Oh,” Anne said. “The necromancers?”“Were entering as I flew back here. They still need to travel along the length of the wall to reach our current position. By my estimates, that will take approximately thirty-five minutes.”Anne chewed on her lower lip. That wasn’t too long, but it was still a long time to wait for much-needed reinforcements. “That’s good,” she decided. “If we can just hold out for that long.”A horn sounded.Anne turned, then winced as she saw the Dark Lord’s army starting to move. They weren’t approaching at anything resembling a charge. Just a slow but careful walk, their formations staying nice and neat as they moved in closer.Commissar Jake below bellowed out some orders, and a single Jake, with a rickety-looking bow, fired a shot out across the gap between the wall and the oncoming army.The arrow wobbled through the air and a long parabolic arc, then, near it zenith, something poofed and a large stone appeared. The arc changed a little with the new weight, and the rock thumped into the ground far ahead of the army.More Jakes picked up bows and arrayed themselves along the wall.Anne moved closer to the edge of the tower. She felt like her breathing was coming in a little too fast, and yet not pulling enough air.The army moved closer and closer, then paused about ten metres past where the stone had landed.A few soldiers ran ahead, then they summoned large, boxy devices with wheels at their base, and large fan-like tops. Soldiers ran up and behind those, then started pushing them forwards. “What are those?” Anne asked.“I presume that they’re siege devices to shield the soldiers pushing them from projectiles,” Newt said.The army started to move once more, slow steps, all in time so that there was a loud ‘whump, whump’ with ever calculated step.“Hold!” the commissar called from below.Bow strings went taunt. They only had twenty or so bows between them all.“Hold!”The army walked past the stone.“Fire!”Twenty bows loosed, three immediately went wild and one of them snapped, the Jake holding it cursing as the bow broke in his hands.The remaining arrows wiggled through way through the air, then came rushing back down. The cards tied to them turned to stone at different heights, and that pulled them down at different rates.Only two large stones hit the army.It was enough to make bile rise in Anne’s throat as boulders the size of a man came crashing down. One atop one of the siege engines, crushing it entirely, another in a formation that wasn’t entirely covered.The screams started below.“Fire!” the commissar called again, and a second volley took to the air.The battle had truly begun.

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The audience has: 95 Points!